Instructions For Victory

[PinkGirl]

Hi Harrie

I totally relate to your post. I often ask
Andi "exactly how am I supposed to do this stuff?"

I, too, have come to realize that it is a process.
Some days something will just happen that helps
me to understand this process and to "get it".

But I don't think it is an easy transition. I am
trying to work at it and I'm not always very
successful. But I'm going to keep trying.

[Mary Jo]

Hello all.....

I too feel as if this is a journey. We learn something new each day as we walk this road. The road we all travel is wrought with all different learning experiences and all different emotions as we travel it.

When I was diagnosed with breast cancer, I too never asked "why me?" But I did ask, "why did this happen and what am I to learn from this experience." When I heard the words, "you have breast cancer" I hung up the phone - sat down on the bed and said "Lord, if I ever needed you, it is now." "Please show me what I am to do and let all I do and say bring all glory to you." From that moment on it's been a real RIDE. Good days - bad days - sad days - happy days BUT not a one of those days didn't teach me something about myself and each of those days has brought me to the woman I am today. A way happier woman and a woman who is at Peace with herself and her God.

I've come to realize that yes, bad things happen to good people but they also happen to bad people. Bad things happen to everyone and although we can't control all that comes our way we can choose how we react (as Andi points us to us often times) to the bad that comes.

One day my "journey" will be over. My life will carry on in Eternity in Heaven because my Savior Jesus paid the price for me. I thank Him for that as I thank Him for this journey. I pray as I walk it I touch many people with the Love He has first given to me and that I would always choose to react positively to whatever comes my way and look at each those "whatevers" as ways to become all He wants for me.

Love and Peace...

Mary Jo

[harrie]

PinkGirl, this is also very much a learning process for me.

Andi, I am somewhat familiar with psychoneuroimmunology. It is a real interesting area of study since it involves how the power of the mind can effect one's immune system in a physiolological way. I believe there is a lot of truth in it.

I was thinking of Andi's thread today. The way I look at diffiicult/challenging situations that come my way is that there are choices. I can do all I can to avoid it, I can find the easiest way to deal with it, or I can accept it and work with it. I can allow that situation to dominate my emotions and thoughts, or I can work to control, grow, and learn from the experience.

I know this sounds easier said then done, but I think one of the keys is awareness....being aware of what the situation is doing on an emotional as well as physical level.

[PinkGirl]

Did any of you see the program yesterday
on Detroit PBS - it was that Jack Canfield guy
who publishes the "Chicken Soup" books?

It was interesting but unfortunately I fell
asleep. He was talking about the law of
attraction and concentrating on what you
want, not on what you don't want. It made
me think of Andi's posts.

[Andrea Barnett Budin]

There is no way to happiness. Happiness is the way.

I agree w/this philosophy. Happiness is what you consciously choose to carry with you, to each experience all you encounter.

However the other day, while confronting a computer crisis -- I lost it. I obsessed and whimpered. I asked for help. To no avail. I poked and prodded and repeated and repeated and repeated what Microsoft Word suggested I do.

Today, I can remember once reading that Thomas Edison tried over 1,000 times to invent the light bulb. Can you begin to imagine his exasperation?! Not even close. But I love his quote. I DID NOT FAIL! RATHER I FOUND 0VER 1,000 WAYS HOW NOT TO INVENT THE LIGHT BULB. (Humor is a great diffuser, don't you think?)

The other day, I lost my perspective. I was so busy trying to get all my ducks in a row I forgot to BREATHE. At the end of the day, I was victorious. My font issue was resolved. And, at my dghtrs behest, which came a tad late, I let go. It is quite the challenge to LET IT GO, but that is often precisely what we must do, I think.

I let my ducks swim away. Of course I envisioned them swimming away in a neat row. As ducks do. Yet my DD said she imagined they were swimming away *in chaotic circles...against my suffocating will*. Hmmm... Humor? Okay, I am willing to laugh at myself. Now...

Usually this child listens to my suffering diatribe, pauses, sighs and sweetly reminds me that I am *disconnected from my spirituality*. And, almost instantly, I begin to heal. I reconnect with my Spirit, my Higher Self, and feel wisdom and serenity streaming toward me. It's my divine connection.

I believe we are here to learn to find the supreme energy of the divinity within us... At our core. I believe my Soul is the Essence of me. On most days, that is... And when I allow it to rule (rather than my EGO) I find happiness.
Andi

[harrie]

Andi....you are so right on.....

Ever wonder why kids are so accepting of what we adults would consider challenging or difficult situations? I believe it is because their egos are not as developed as adults and allows them to accept and deal with situations without the fears and inhibitions that we adults have. Plus I believe their spirits are...whats the word here....are less "surpressed" and are able to express itself more with less of a strong ego counteracting.

Just another thought of mine to share.....

[Andrea Barnett Budin]

The ego thing. It's all about your ego vs your Spirit, I finally learned. One defeats you and the other lifts you up. So it's real important to able to identify when ego is moving in to try and take charge...

WHEN MY EGO SPEAKS, I must REMEMBER – IT’S FULL OF ITSELF! Like when I'm busy opposing reality (RESISTING) or being inundated with thoughts that tend to engulf me in misery and despair, I'm likely being tormented by my ego! That the root cause. It just delights in telling me that I am being threatened and often scares me to tears. Then, I consequently find myself unconsciously identifying myself as “the victim”. I feel exquisitely vulnerable. Helpless and powerless. Now (most days) I can see -- THAT’S MY EGO TALKING!

Neurotic, obsessive, sad, fearful, angry, frustrated, resentful, blaming, remorseful, judgmental, unforgiving reactions are egoic by nature. You’ll never do this, warns my ego. Then it throws in the clincher -- WHAT IF..........!!!??? So, naturally, I become beyond feeling unsure of myself. I feel alone. Isolated. DISCONNECTED. Like Something is missing. BECAUSE I AM DISCONNECTED FROM -- MY TRUE SELF! Such awful moments reflect my forgetting who I am. I'm misidentifying myself. I am deriving my sense of Self from just my mind and my form. I AM OUT OF TOUCH WITH MY SPIRIT, at my core.

I have learned -- YOU ARE NOT YOUR MIND! That fear and self-pity are egoic. Ego driven thoughts can easily fool you into allowing it to rule and ruin your life. Intellectually I know I am not my emotions. That my thoughts create how I feel and that I have the Power to sculpt my thoughts. And, I happen to believe that we each have the Power to call our desired DESTINY to us, with the power of our thoughts. Every thought is like a prayer. Every prayer is a potential miracle.

Ego subdues your self-confidence and dispirits your power!! It dis-empowers you! However, when your Inner Voice, or Spirit, is allowed to take over and lead you -- you leave your basest Self (your Id) and your egoic phase of being, and move toward becoming your Higher Self, the Self that Dwells Within. Andi

[harrie]

Very well written Andi and I very much agree with what you said.

I have only taken up yoga for about a year now, and much of what I am now aware of with the spirit and ego are what yoga has shown me. I have MUCH to learn yet, but what I have learned so far has help me in my awareness.

In the physical-spiritual relationship, I compare the importance of the stength of the core, abdominal and back areas, as the basis of maintaining good form for workouts and the prevention of injury, to the spiritual core of a person which is one's soul.

Maryanne

[Andrea Barnett Budin]

Hi there y'all, my sweet Sisters and Brothers,

I had my Herceptin tx today. I'm in my 10th yr. I felt very blissful sitting in the chemo room. A nurse came up to me as I was being infused, Andrea, how long have you been cancer-free? Since 1999, I said. She smiled, I knew it was something like that b/c my daughter just turned 7. (Claire was pregnant, it feels like yesterday.) I dove back into MANIFEST YOUR DESTINY, by Wayne Dyer, highlighter in hand. My second reading...

I see that expanding my consciousness beyond the *egoic* phase is in fact -- a letting go of identifying myself as my physicality and mentality.

When I reach for my Higher Self, I feel *on purpose*. Like that's what we're supposed to do. We're to come to realize our connection to one another. To treat others as we would like to be treated. I think we are each an expression of God. And The Golden Rule marks a behavior that is godly by nature.

Our Spirits are divine Energy. A piece of divinity resides within each of us. I find that revelation as electrifying, as it is empowering. My Spirit is the True Me. My Higher Self. (What Freud called our Superego, or moral compass.)

I have learned that a Soul is full of the purest Universal Love -- if we live with an open heart. When I'm connected to my spiritual and sacred Soul, I feel giving and compassionate, grateful and at peace. In balance and harmonious. In sync with the Universe. Ready to allow the natural process to unfold.

Meditation brings me to this merging. That's when I feel I KNOW that I *am* a Spirit. When I look at others, that is what a see. Another Soul. With a mind and a body. When I look at others, I see myself. I attempt to project my energy, offering strength and sustenance to those who are open. I try to send out good vibes.

Does this make sense to you?

Andi

[Bill]

Sweet Andi, it makes perfect sense to me. I, and I'm sure"we" can feel your energy and those good vibes. You keep on emanating, girl! (uh, oh, one thing I've been wondering, is it offensive for a man to call a "woman" a "girl", in other words, do you gals like it or not like it. Some dames like it, some don't. Most men are offended to be called a boy, I just laugh, is it the same thing? I bet it all boils down to the particular woman, doesn't it? Never mind, I think I just answered my own question. I'm just trying to establish a code of conduct or speech that can be universal, a sort of "A Man's Handbook In Dealing With Women", something fathers hand down to sons, etc., but it probably wouldn't work out.) Anyhow, you go girl!

[Andrea Barnett Budin]

I readily accept a "YOU GO GIRL"! (FYI, Bill et al). To me the phrase is full of comradery, approval and encouragement. What could be wrong with that?!However -- I don't think most females are keen on being called, or thought of, as dames, chicks and the like (since you've asked Billy, our man)... On the other hand, being called "ma'am" roils me, making me feel more old than respected. Honey kind of makes me uncomfortable too, though I call a whole lot of pp honey (expressing warmth) and meaning no disrespect. I hug a lot too. That's just me. I'm a hugger. But, IMHO, men using such nomenclature toward us gals () are standing on the edge of a cliff. When a salesman or stranger calls me honey, I back away... Not you, Bill honey, though. We're family!

As an aside: Joseph Campbell writes that it would be wonderful if we each called one another THOU!! The act, he says, would make us think of one another with a reverence that has faded from our culture. This learned scholar and teacher believed that speaking to and of one another as a THOU would psychologically alter our perspectives and solidify relationships. Hmmmm... The idea always intrigued me. (From THE POWER OF MYTH.)

FYI -- I am off to New York for a week, so if y'all are wondering where I went to, please note. I am seeing docs but having a ball with family and dear old friends, on *vacation* (full of hugs and laughter and taking care of business). I expect all good reports and will touch base w/my beloved nut onc (nutritional oncologist). I'll be thinking of you all, and saying prayers for Michelle H., Kate, Lily and more I can't recall at the moment, but I will. Love you guys... Play nicely...
Andi

[tricia keegan]

Andi, I love reading your posts and adore your philosophy on life, congratulations on your tenth year with NED! What an achievement...it's what we all strive for. Ever thought of writing a book "FOR DUMMIES" like myself who would love to know more???

[StephN]

Andi -
Thou dost departeth and haveth a merry time in Noo Yawk.

When Thou returneth, please maketh thyself welcome here anon.

Shakespeare and company are probably laughing out loud, but the pilgrims did speak like that!