Anxiety overexpression...WOW!!

Annemarie my heart goes out to you. I am just another one on this board thats been there. I spent the first year (its been 3 1/2 years ) doing just that. Trying to figure this whole journey out and never did do it. Into the second year with ativan for anxiety, reaching out to new friends, some I met in support, some in oncology that were worse then myself, I joined a local small church for volunteer work. As I felt better I reached out to help some of these friends that had needs as well. Now, I am so busy thinking of how I can help others I don't have time to think about my regrets or what should I have done different. The doctors and nurses tell me how things really changed for me. I stay awake during chemo and talk to others. The nurses tell me I am a good listener and they see me inspiring the others. Now, they put me with the younger ones hoping we will bond and we do. It didn't happen over night. Praying gives me great comfort. I attend a Bible Study group during the week and that gets me from one Sunday to Sunday until I can get to church. We have a quiet time during this Bible Study and share our needs from week to week. Even the minister is able to share his needs and we all have them. Its a great support time. You have to search and decide what your fits into your journey that will give you strength and inspiration to you. I hope this helps and you don't feel like I have preached to you. Remember its been 3 1/2 years for me so it didn't happen over night. I also tried other things that did not work for me. Keep looking. I have to stay away from people that bring me down and some of those have been family members and old friend as well as co workers. Some are now back with me. I am able to kindly tell them why I am a different now. Bigs hugs and prayers go out to you. Sandy H.