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Old 01-07-2009, 08:59 PM   #1
Bill
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The Campfire

I've lit a campfire, and I'm asking you all to join me in tending it. At times, we all awake in the darkest hours, alone and fearful. But no more. At all hours, 'round the clock, both night and day, our campfire will be burning, with friends gathered about, embracing one another and welcoming those who wish to come into the light and toss a piece of wood into the fire and burn their fears away. I've lit the fire, and now, I place another log into it, in the hopes that all of Celeste's (Freyja) fears burn away. I'm sure that, at any given moment, there will be a fire-tender around.
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Old 01-07-2009, 10:02 PM   #2
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Very beautiful thoughts, Bill. You can count me in as one of the tenders of that warm fire (I'll put some logs on later tonight). What a comfort to know that we can all wake up at any hour of the day or night and realize that we have a job to do, for ourselves and each other. I'll bring the marshmallows and the kindling.Bye, Bye fear..... Love, vickie
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Love and Hugs, Vickie

Life's not about waiting for the storm to pass,
It's about learning to dance in the rain.


Feb 04 IBC IIIC/IV er-/pr- her2+++
3/04 TCH X4
7/ 04 MRM 9/04 Taxol/herceptin wkly 1 yr 33X rads
11/04 skin mets 33x rads,10/05 Avast/Herc. 11 mos.
8/ 06 PET mets lymphs, neck
9/ 06 Navelbine/herceptin
11/ 06 PET NED
2/ 07 skin mets, 4/07 Xeloda, 5/07 add Tykerb
2/ 08 Tykerb failed. Doxil /Herceptin 6 months
8/08 PET skin mets, 8/08 Abraxane/Avastin
11/ 08 PET prog., skin mets
1/09 PET/CT progress, 1/09 Ixempra, 2/09 add Xeloda and low dose Naltrexone
2/09 off Ixempra/Xeloda
3/09 navelbine/herc/cytoxin 4/09 PET shows regress.7/09 start Topotecan. Failed.
8/09 extensive mets rgt brst, back and torso. starting Pazopanib clinical trial.
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Old 01-08-2009, 07:06 AM   #3
Believe51
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Hey guys, I'll bring the graham crackers and of course the chocolate for our Smore's. I've been saying my prayers for her anyway but it is nice having our family gather in one place. And I will have to take my blankie since I am travelling, I never leave home without it! Anything else I can bring?? Cupcakes!>>Believe51
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9/7/06Husband 50yrs=StageIV IBC/HER2+,BoneMets10/06TaxotereX10,'H'1X wk,Zometa,Tamoxifen4/12/07Last Tax5/18/07Pet=Rapid Cell Activity,No Organ Mets,Lytic Lesions,Degeneration,Some Bone Repair5/07ChemoFail6/01/07Pleural Thoracentisis=Effusions,NoMalignantCells6/19/07+7/2/07DFCI
6/25/07BrainMRI=BrainMets,Many<9mm7/10/07WBR/PelvisRad37.5Gx15&Nutritionist8/19/07T/X9/20/07BrainMRI=2<2mm10/6/07Pet=BoneProgression
10/24/07ChemoFail11/9/07A/Cx10,EndTam12/7/07Faslodex12/10/07Muga7512/13/07BlasticLesions1/7/08BrainMRI=Clear4/1/08Pet=BoneImprovement,
NoProgression,Stable4/7/08BrainPerfect5/16/08Last A/C8/26/08BrainMets=10(<9mm)9/10/08Gamma10/30/08Met=5mm12/19/08Gamma5mets5
12/22/08SpinalMets1/14/09SpinalRads2/17/09BrainMRI=NoNewMets4/20/09BoneScan5/14/09Ixempra6/1/09BrainMRI=NumerousMets6/24/09DFCIw/DrBurstein6/26/09Continue
Ixempra/Faslodex/Zometa~TM now lower7/17/09Stop Ixempra By Choice9/21/09HOSPICE10/16/09Earned His Deserved Wings And Halo=37 Month Fight w/Stage 4 IBC, Her2+++,My Hero!!
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Old 01-08-2009, 01:42 PM   #4
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Tears of joy.

Bill, you got me. I just shed a tear of joy. I'm a big, big fan of campfires. I'll be stoking this one every day. Your flame is eternally burning in my heart...and that goes for everyone here.
Believe51, you are awesome. I've got my blankie too, and a banjo for those late night/early morning Bluegrass tunes. I haven't learned to play it, yet, but it's on my list.
Vickie's right, bye bye fear. How can I be afraid with people like this around?
Celeste
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"Dancers Against Cancer" in the Eugene, OR Komen Race for the Cure 2010
Diagnosed 8/7/08 with stage 3 invasive ductal carcinoma, micropapillary pattern, Her2 3+, ER+,PR-, grade II, positive lymph nodes.
Received 6doses of Taxotere, Carboplatin with Herceptin continuing for a year...DONE.
1/28/09 Left Modified Radical Mastectomy, Right Simple Mastectomy.
Surgery pathology: No invasive carcinoma present and 17 lymph nodes removed all negative! Only small amount of carcinoma in situ in left breast.
March/April '09, Radiation to left chest wall.
Currently involved in Neratinib clinical trial.

"Well being I won
and wisdom too,
I grew and joyed in my growth;
from a word to a word
I was led to a word
from a deed to another deed." (Odin)

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Old 01-08-2009, 01:56 PM   #5
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Celeste, since you haven't learned how to play yet I feel a little better. I will sing, out of tune (lol) and hopefully you will drown me out....hehehe. As some of you know, I am a vampire so staying up to keep the home fires burning is not an issue, I'll take the night shift. Lots of love.>>Believe51
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9/7/06Husband 50yrs=StageIV IBC/HER2+,BoneMets10/06TaxotereX10,'H'1X wk,Zometa,Tamoxifen4/12/07Last Tax5/18/07Pet=Rapid Cell Activity,No Organ Mets,Lytic Lesions,Degeneration,Some Bone Repair5/07ChemoFail6/01/07Pleural Thoracentisis=Effusions,NoMalignantCells6/19/07+7/2/07DFCI
6/25/07BrainMRI=BrainMets,Many<9mm7/10/07WBR/PelvisRad37.5Gx15&Nutritionist8/19/07T/X9/20/07BrainMRI=2<2mm10/6/07Pet=BoneProgression
10/24/07ChemoFail11/9/07A/Cx10,EndTam12/7/07Faslodex12/10/07Muga7512/13/07BlasticLesions1/7/08BrainMRI=Clear4/1/08Pet=BoneImprovement,
NoProgression,Stable4/7/08BrainPerfect5/16/08Last A/C8/26/08BrainMets=10(<9mm)9/10/08Gamma10/30/08Met=5mm12/19/08Gamma5mets5
12/22/08SpinalMets1/14/09SpinalRads2/17/09BrainMRI=NoNewMets4/20/09BoneScan5/14/09Ixempra6/1/09BrainMRI=NumerousMets6/24/09DFCIw/DrBurstein6/26/09Continue
Ixempra/Faslodex/Zometa~TM now lower7/17/09Stop Ixempra By Choice9/21/09HOSPICE10/16/09Earned His Deserved Wings And Halo=37 Month Fight w/Stage 4 IBC, Her2+++,My Hero!!
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Old 01-08-2009, 07:38 PM   #6
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good night

I've got hot chocolate and grilled cheese at the fire tonight. One of the first songs I plan to learn on the banjo is Rainbow Connection, Kermit D. Frog style. Care to join me?
"Someday we'll find it, the Rainbow Connection,
The lovers, the dreamers and meee."
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"Dancers Against Cancer" in the Eugene, OR Komen Race for the Cure 2010
Diagnosed 8/7/08 with stage 3 invasive ductal carcinoma, micropapillary pattern, Her2 3+, ER+,PR-, grade II, positive lymph nodes.
Received 6doses of Taxotere, Carboplatin with Herceptin continuing for a year...DONE.
1/28/09 Left Modified Radical Mastectomy, Right Simple Mastectomy.
Surgery pathology: No invasive carcinoma present and 17 lymph nodes removed all negative! Only small amount of carcinoma in situ in left breast.
March/April '09, Radiation to left chest wall.
Currently involved in Neratinib clinical trial.

"Well being I won
and wisdom too,
I grew and joyed in my growth;
from a word to a word
I was led to a word
from a deed to another deed." (Odin)

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Old 01-08-2009, 07:44 PM   #7
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Wink The Campfire

I'll bring my blanket and some every present cereal bars and join you. The campfire will keep us all warm and send the fears away.
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Peace,
ElaineM
12 years and counting
http://her2support.org/vbulletin/showthread.php?t=48247
Lucky 13 !! I hope so !!!!!!
http://her2support.org/vbulletin/showthread.php?t=52807
14 Year Survivor
http://her2support.org/vbulletin/showthread.php?t=57053
"You never know how strong you are until being strong is the only choice you have." author unknown
Shared by a multiple myeloma survivor.
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Old 01-08-2009, 09:38 PM   #8
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Oooohh, hot choc. and grilled cheese sounds good. I play the harmonica, a "harmonica-savant" some have called me. Here, let me stick a piece of wood in our fire.....
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Old 01-08-2009, 09:59 PM   #9
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I'll throw another on for sweet Celeste!

Marcia
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Old 01-09-2009, 08:51 AM   #10
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I like to warm my front side at the fire and then give my sweety a big hug. It feels so warm.

I always bring a six string guitar to a campfire. The twelve string heats up unevenly and it won't stay in tune. I like to play mellow songs or cowboy songs.

No s'mores for me. The gooey goodness gets all over your fingers so you can't play music.

There is too much fear around, I'll go out into the woods and gather some more wood.
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This happened to Colleen:

Diagnosed in September 2007
ER-/PR-/HER2 Neu+++ 2.1 cm x .9 cm spicluted tumor with three fingers, Stage 2B
Sentinal node biopsy and lymph node removal with 3/18 positive in October 2007
4 TAC infusions
lumpectomy March 2008, bad margins
Re-excision on June 3rd, 2008 with clean margins
Fitted for compression sleeve July 16, 2008
Started the first of two TCH infusions August 14, 2008
Done with chemo and now a member of the blue dot club 9/17/08
Starting radiation October 1, 2008
life is still on hold
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Old 01-09-2009, 10:16 AM   #11
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campfire.

Now I know we will all be safe in the woods. We have both Bill and Lee taking care of us and helping to allay our fears. You guys are awesome, xoxo Jeanette
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Old 01-09-2009, 01:15 PM   #12
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I come to the campfire to just be with all you wonderful people, especially Freyja.

Amelia
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Old 01-09-2009, 05:17 PM   #13
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I too throw a log on this fire (of Hope) to keep it going. I pray that just as the embers from the fire float up in the air and disappear, so will all the fears that are brought here.

Thanks Bill.
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Gerri
Dx: 11/23/05, Lumpectomy 12/12/05
Tumor 2.2 cm, Stage II, Grade 3, Sentinel Node biopsy negative
ER+ (30%) /PR+ (50%), HER2+++
AC X 4 dose dense, Taxol X 4 dose dense
Herceptin started with 2nd Taxol, given weekly until chemo done
then given every 3 weeks for one year ending on March 16, 2007
Radiation 30 treatments
Tamoxifen - 2 yrs (pre-menopausal)
May 2008 - Feb 2012 Femara
Aug 2008 - Feb 2012 Zometa every 6 months
March 2012 - Stop Femara, now Evista for bone strengthening
**********
Enjoy the little things, for one day you may look
back and realize they were the big things.
- Robert Brault

Last edited by Gerri; 01-09-2009 at 09:36 PM..
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Old 01-09-2009, 07:54 PM   #14
freyja
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smiles and laughs

The thought of us sittin around the fire singin and eating munchies and grinnin, makes me smile, even giggle a little. I feel so not alone.
I brought a whole pile of logs for us tonight. Let's put them all on and watch the flames rise.
__________________

"Dancers Against Cancer" in the Eugene, OR Komen Race for the Cure 2010
Diagnosed 8/7/08 with stage 3 invasive ductal carcinoma, micropapillary pattern, Her2 3+, ER+,PR-, grade II, positive lymph nodes.
Received 6doses of Taxotere, Carboplatin with Herceptin continuing for a year...DONE.
1/28/09 Left Modified Radical Mastectomy, Right Simple Mastectomy.
Surgery pathology: No invasive carcinoma present and 17 lymph nodes removed all negative! Only small amount of carcinoma in situ in left breast.
March/April '09, Radiation to left chest wall.
Currently involved in Neratinib clinical trial.

"Well being I won
and wisdom too,
I grew and joyed in my growth;
from a word to a word
I was led to a word
from a deed to another deed." (Odin)

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Old 01-10-2009, 10:52 AM   #15
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y'all made me cry. i think we need maybe some chocolate martinis to liven us up even more so i'll bring those.
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dxd 9-04, lumpectomy,
st 1, gr 3, er,pr-, her2 +,
2 tac,33 rads,6 cmf
1 yr herceptin,
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Old 01-10-2009, 01:37 PM   #16
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Wink The Campfire

I have an idea. I would like to invite anyone with fears to bring those fears written on a piece of paper. After the campfire gets going we can invite people to throw those pieces of papers with their fears on them into the fire to be burned. Our warmth as a group will help chase those fears further away. After we leave the campfire we will all be ready for a new beginning and the strength to keep walking fearlessly and do whatever it takes until everyone is NED.
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Peace,
ElaineM
12 years and counting
http://her2support.org/vbulletin/showthread.php?t=48247
Lucky 13 !! I hope so !!!!!!
http://her2support.org/vbulletin/showthread.php?t=52807
14 Year Survivor
http://her2support.org/vbulletin/showthread.php?t=57053
"You never know how strong you are until being strong is the only choice you have." author unknown
Shared by a multiple myeloma survivor.
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Old 01-10-2009, 01:42 PM   #17
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The campfire

Elaine, That is a wonderful idea. I am going to write my fears down tonight, Jeanette
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Old 01-10-2009, 05:30 PM   #18
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Lee, I'm with you on the S'mores, so I'll bring some hot dogs to roast. No buns, just the dogs. And oh yea, I'll cut some good sturdy roasting sticks. If we decide not to roast the dogs, we can roast our fears on our sturdy sticks!
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Rhonda (Sassy)
dx age 45
DX 2/15/05 Stage IIb (at surgery)restaged IIIa
Left mast .9cm tumor 5 of 14 nodes
Triple Positive
4 DD A/C
12 Taxol/Herceptin
33Rads
Strange infect mast site one year aft surg, hosp 1 wk
Herceptin for total of 18 months
Lupron Monthly 4 yrs
Neurontin for aches, pains and hot flashes(It works!)
Ovaries removed 11/09 stop Lupron and Neurontin
Arimidex 6 yrs (tried Femara, no SE improvement)
Tried Exemestane-hips got so bad could hardly walk
Back to Arimidex for year seven
Zometa 2X Annual for 7years, Lasix
Stop Arimidex 5/13
Stop Zometa 7/13-Bi-lateral Stress Fractures in Femurs from Zometa
5/14 Start Tamoxifen
3/15 Stem cell transplant to stimulate femur bone growth/healing
5/15 Complete fracture of right femur/Titanium rods both femurs
9/16 Start Evista stopTamoxifen
3/17 Stop Evista--unwelcome side effects!
NED and no meds.......
14YEARS NED!
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Old 01-10-2009, 08:34 PM   #19
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Great idea, Elaine! Right now, I'm tossing a piece of wood onto our special fire and asking for a moment of silence. A close friend of a close friend of ours has been injured and needs our thoughts and prayers. Just a moment of positive thought, and prayer, as we gather around our fire, together, hand-in-hand, can work wonders.
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Old 01-10-2009, 09:19 PM   #20
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Oh crap, I just heard something in the woods... oops, sorry I spilled your cocoa, Bill. Lee, would you be so kind to put on my infrared headset and see what I heard? Sasquatch you say? What was that Lee, I can't understand you, you sound like you're choking or something. Stop kidding around. Lee? Lee? Uh oh.
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Brenda

NOV 2012 - 9 yr anniversary
JULY 2012 - 7 yr anniversary stage IV (of 50...)

Nov'03~ dX stage 2B
Dec'03~
Rt side mastectomy, Her2+, ER/PR+, 10 nodes out, one node positive
Jan'04~
Taxotere/Adria/Cytoxan x 6, NED, no Rads, Tamox. 1 year, Arimadex 3 mo., NED 14 mo.
Sept'05~
micro mets lungs/chest nodes/underarm node, Switched to Aromasin, T/C/H x 7, NED 6 months - Herceptin only
Aug'06~
micro mets chest nodes, & bone spot @ C3 neck, Added Taxol to Herceptin
Feb'07~ Genetic testing, BRCA 1&2 neg

Apr'07~
MRI - two 9mm brain mets & 5 punctates, new left chest met, & small increase of bone spot C3 neck, Stopped Aromasin
May'07~
Started Tykerb/Xeloda, no WBR for now
June'07~
MRI - stable brain mets, no new mets, 9mm spots less enhanced, CA15.3 down 45.5 to 9.3 in 10 wks, Ty/Xel working magic!
Aug'07~
MRI - brain mets shrunk half, NO NEW BRAIN METS!!, TMs stable @ 9.2
Oct'07~
PET/CT & MRI show NED
Apr'08~
scans still show NED in the head, small bone spot on right iliac crest (rear pelvic bone)
Sept'08~
MRI shows activity in brain mets, completed 5 fractions/5 consecutive days of IMRT to zap the pesky buggers
Oct'08~
dropped Xeloda, switched to tri-weekly Herceptin in combo with Tykerb, extend to tri-monthly Zometa infusion
Dec'08~
Brain MRI- 4 spots reduced to punctate size, large spot shrunk by 3mm, CT of torso clear/pelvis spot stable
June'09~
new 3-4mm left cerrebellar spot zapped with IMRT targeted rads
Sept'09~
new 6mm & 1 cm spots in pituitary/optic chiasm area. Rx= 25 days of 3D conformal fractionated targeted IMRT to the tumors.
Oct'09~
25 days of low dose 3D conformal fractionated targeted IMRT to the bone mets spot on rt. iliac crest that have been watching for 2 years. Added daily Aromasin back into treatment regimen.
Apr'10~ Brain MRI clear! But, see new small spot on adrenal gland. Change from Aromasin back to Tamoxifen.
June'10~ Tumor markers (CA15.3) dropped from 37 to 23 after one month on Tamoxifen. Continue to monitor adrenal gland spot. Remain on Tykerb/Herceptin/Tamoxifen.
Nov'10~ Radiate positive mediastinal node that was pressing on recurrent laryngeal nerve, causing paralyzed larynx and a funny voice.
Jan'11~ MRI shows possible activity or perhaps just scar tissue/necrotic increase on 3 previously treated brain spots and a pituitary spot. 5 days of IMRT on 4 spots.
Feb'11~ Enrolled in T-DM1 EAP in Denver, first treatment March 25, 2011.
Mar'11~ Finally started T-DM1 EAP in Denver at Rocky Mountain Cancer Center/Rose on Mar. 25... hallelujah.

"I would rather be anecdotally alive than statistically dead."
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