Don't buy into the negative crap!

[Cathy1]

If anyone starts in with the "Terminal" stuff, tune them right out!
There is no one on the face of the earth who is not terminal. Since being diagnosed in 1999, I have known people who died from diabetes, heart trouble, and accidents. I have lived more in the past eight years than in all the years since my birth. Until I was diagnosed in '99, I had never really lived- not like I do now, savoring every precious second and changing the things in my life that needed to be fixed; making peace with God and learning to be kind to all of His children. Cancer has ultimately been the blessing that has allowed me to pour out my true loving feelings for my family and friends, so they will never doubt how much they were loved.
I never noticed the miraculous wonders of creation until lately- the miracle of each human person, the gorgeous colors and types of flowers and trees. the sparkles in the snow, the magnificence of water (I'm so grateful to be able to take a bath every day)
Live every second of this special life you have been given and appreciate your life for the beautiful and spectacular gift bestowed upon you by your awsome and loving Heavenly Father. He alone is the author of all life and He alone knows how many seconds each person has left before He takes us out of here.
Focus on all things uplifting and positive, stay away from negative people, and replace every negative thought with a positive one.I beleive God is using each one of you for a special purpose and I beleive you are all Saints.
God Bless and Keep You All- Cathy

[juanita]

Amen to what you said! My first onc was into the negative side of the numbers and not the positives. And when I quit him and that chemo he made feel like I was going to die because I was quitting. Here I am 2 1/2 years later still fighting and kicking!

[Sandy H]

Cathy, I agree with everything you said. I fit into that whole new life. I have done things I never dreamed I would ever do. I even dressed different like the bright green lime shoes I purchased in Florida. Everyone is special to me each in a different way. Everything here on earth I see in a whole new light. I have become closer to God through this journey. I am more free to reach out to people therefore, have many more friends. I took up oil painting and really surprised myself at what I am painting for pictures. There are 3 bc people taking the class-all new at it and maybe more but haven't said they are bc. We are all beginners. I don't have any negative friends around me if I do I can change them real quick or stay away from them. Wishing you well, sounds like you are living life to the fullest and so am I. People don't bother me anymore if I want to do it I do it!! God Bless you Cathy, hugs Sandy

[TriciaK]

Cathy, I couldn't agree more! I am convinced that staying positive is one of the main reasons I have made it through 21 years of fighting cancer, and especially since June 2004 when I was fighting a heart attack, BC mets to my lungs and phuemonia, then open heart surgery last May! I learned self hynosis and put it into daily practice. I never say "I have cancer" but "I am fighting cancer". When my oncologist told me I might have another year to live, I told him, "No, I have at least 5 years to live!" That was almost three years ago. I couldn't have done it without a wonderful supportive husband and a large loving family. I also give much credit to this wonderful website and all you Amazon warriors who keep fighting. You are absolutely right on, Cathy, and so are all the others who have and will agree with you about avoiding the negative. Only God knows when our time will be up, and I understand it may possibly be negotiated with Him, too! Keep on a'keepin' on! Thank you for your post. We need to be reminded to "accentuate the positive and eliminate the negative"! Hugs, Tricia

[bobbiw]

It truly is a life altering diagnosis-at least for me. I am now more positive than I have ever been, about everything. More at peace, more laid back.

Thank you for your post.

Bobbi

[MJo]

While I can't call cancer a blessing, I know that it has definitely changed me and I am not the person I was. I am better in many ways. And while taking life one day, one hour at a time is very difficult for me, I am surely savoring my life more than before.

[heblaj01]

Years ago I listened on TV to the interview of a well known French oncologist on a tour of lectures in North America. He said (& this was before many of the new treatments were discovered):I treat & save 30% of the "terminal" patients refered to me after they have been given up by their caregiver.

His motto was never to give up hope.

[Sherryg683]

OK, I'm going to be the wet noodle here. I do not in any way believe that cancer has been a "blessing" to me. And honestly say that it is hard for me to find one positive thing about it. This saying, I was diagnosed at stage IV. Maybe if I was diagnosed at stage I and felt there was a cure, I would be a little more positive. I have young children and it hurts like crazy knowing what the prognosis is...so sorry if I'm not doing a happy dance lately. But I have not given up on life or living. I do travel more, take more time to spend with my kids and do appreciate the beauty of nature. There's just always this sadness in me that I can't seem to shake. I will fight this with all I have, I have just had too many people that I love and care for die of cancer, so I know what i'm facing. My brother is in the last stages of melanoma at the moment, it's in his liver. He was a big strong guy, who was a body builder..now he's just weak and half his self. It's just been a hard year for me and hopefully I can shake what I've been feeling lately so that I can enjoy things more...sherryg683

[Gerri]

Sherry,

I totally agree with you that cancer has not been a "blessing" nor is it the "best thing that has ever happened to me". Feeling your mortality is certainly not being negative - just realistic. But in reading your message I still see that you have HOPE and a strong will to live! I admit it is easier for those of us diagnosed at an early stage to have a more positive outlook. I apologize if at times I/we seem insensitive to those of you diagnosed at a later stage.

I am so sorry to hear about your brother. My heart breaks for you.

Keep fighting the fight!!

Gerri

[Barbara H.]

Sherry,
First of all I am sorry to hear about your brother. I also agree with you, that at least for me, cancer has not been a blessing. I have grown from the experience, but would never choose to travel this road. I also have a daughter with autism. Yes, I have also grown from that experience as well, and it has made me a better teacher, but again, I would not choose this path in life. Unforturnately, there are many choices in life we do not make.

On the other hand, we do have the opportunity to make some decisions and choices when our lives are interrupted with adversity, and it is not appropriate for others to question our choices. That's why I feel the Edward's family should be supported for the decision they have made.

My thoughts are with you!

Barbara H.

[jag]

Amen Cathy...couldnt Have Said It Better Myself....

[Jean]

Dear Sherry,
I don't think your a wet noodle, we all hate this disease thats for certain.
I am very sorry that your brother is sick, life is so fragile. It is difficult
enough just to raise our children without the concerns of staying healthy
for them. Prior to dx. I think it is only natural for many to take for granted
how easy life really is as long as you are well. Then after dx. it hits like
a hammer - and the daily things in life become even more precious.

I believe that all the ladies of all stages feel the same bond, we hate the
disease and have realized that now everything else seems rather small,
and have a greater appreciation of life.

We all have bad days...and thats okay. By he way I know some very
nice wet noodles....I will keep you and your brother in my prayers.


Hugs,
Jean

[chrisy]

First of all, I don't watch ANY daytime TV as I work (more than) full time. So I don't really know what I'm talking about on this thread, but the discussion has been great!

And EVERYONE who has commented on this thread is absolutely right. We're angry, sad, focused, positive, hopeful, all of it at different times.

I agree, you have to focus on the postive and as StephN said, be forward looking. And keep living your life.

The reality is, at this time metastatic disease is "not curable" but is treatable. This was Mrs. Edwards initial statement about her prognosis, and is exactly what I was told by my rockstar oncologist. At that point, hearing that they were beginning to look at Stage IV bc as a chronic condition that could be managed for a long time was the first HOPE we got. My other hope is that major breakthroughs are just around the corner.

On the other hand, although Rosie or whoever quoted stats was probably quoting accurate stats, they are historical and thus (hopefully!) improving every day. Furthermore, statistics are just that and not a specific prognosis for any individual. There are so many factors influencing this.

That said, I think that the media loves to use words like "terminal" because that makes it so much more dramatic. Like we NEED more drama in our lives! That does a disservice to those who are trying to maintain positive energy in the face of a difficult situation.

Anyway, I'm ramblin on aimlessly, you are all so awesome I thought maybe if I posted on this thread I could be awesome by association!

Chris

[Adriana Mangus]

I agree with everything you say Cathy. I do stay away from negativity and concentrate on the positiveness that Life has to offer.

People do not understand what a BLESSING this disease has been to me.
I appreciate every single moment of my life doing what really inspires me, taking time away from work, enjoying vacation time with my husband and my daughter, cooking -experimenting - for my family, etc.etc....(kinda of like to see the look on their faces - they think am crazy, ja ja ja).

I have always been close to my family, but this disease makes it so much more special when I get to visit them. I enjoy every single moment of my life.

I'm not happy...

I AM CONTENT. CONTENT WITH MY LIFE, CONTENT WITH MYSELF.

Thank you for your inspirational note..it's going to stay with me for a long long time...