Breaking up is hard to do

StephN · 07-17-2006, 01:52 PM

What I mean by the above is that I had my last appt with my very wonderful medical oncologist today. I posted a few weeks ago that he is leaving the area.

He gave me good news - that my CT of chest and Abdoman of last week were clear as a bell and tumor markers low. No Evidence of Disease. And he is still amazed that I have been off chemo now for FOUR years and my disease has not returned (he does not count my brain mets, as he feels the seeds for those got there during my raging liver mets).

I remembered the time six years ago that he looked at me with those soft, kind eyes and gave me his card saying he would take me as a patient even if I did not want the rest of the normal team he works with (I did not). He was the first person to let me know that my disease was aggressive and would need special treatment. I felt reassured somehow in those early days of my diagnosis and the reassurance carried me through my bout with mets (even though there was a lot of doubt until the first scan showed results).

He seemed to have confidence in my ability to handle the treatments and this was coming through in his attitude towards me.

So, a good news/bad news sort of day for me. Happy for good results, happy to be alive and not needing more treatment. Sad to see a wonderful doctor leave my life that I feel is largely responsible for giving back to me.

I know he prescribed the tough drugs and my body did the work, but they were the RIGHT drugs for me.

Guess I will go get a bar of nice dark chocolate - time for comfort food!

Lisa · 07-17-2006, 02:15 PM

Steph,

I can't imagine losing my onc, so I can understand your sadness. But at least he left you with a wonderful parting farewell!

Love and light,

Lisa

Lisa · 07-17-2006, 02:20 PM

Friends,

Today I wired $2,854.50 to Peter Pilgrim, Lyn's brother. He had no idea we would raise this much money, but I had faith. A hearty thanks to each of you who contributed. I'm sure Lyn would have something witty to say about this, so I feel sure she's smiling down.

As I've mentioned, I will be sending each of you a formal thank you on HER2 letterhead for income tax purposes.

Much love and light,

Lisa

P.S. If anyone would still like to contribute, send it to me and I'll send it on to Peter.

Barbara H. · 07-17-2006, 02:22 PM

Your post said it all, Steph. I wish continued good health and NED for you. I'm sure you will develop an excellent rapport with your new oncologist, but it does take time.
Best wishes,
Barbara H.

sassy · 07-17-2006, 04:59 PM

Steph,

So glad you got good news, tempered with sadness. Hopefully you will find a new onc that will deserve your confidence once again.

Sassy
________
Laguna Bay II Condominium Pattaya

Sandy H · 07-17-2006, 06:06 PM

Great news on NED! Good doctors like their patients to be their own advocates or so my oncologist keeps telling me. He says he doesn't worry about us because we will keep them straight!!! I am sure you will continue to do well with your new oncologist once you know each other and create that trust we all have. Best wishes, hugs, Sandy

Sheila · 07-17-2006, 07:23 PM

Steph
Great news on the tests, and you are so deserving....so hard to lose your oncologist....I do not know what I would do....but I see that mine will retire soon....we build such a rapport and they gain our confidence...it is like losing a best friend....the new one better be good to you to fill the shoes he will walk in!!!

judiek · 07-17-2006, 07:30 PM

Steph,

I hope that you will find another onc that you can trust and love...your story is so incredible. Great news...here's to many many more good years Steph!

Warmly,

Judiek

mamacze · 07-17-2006, 08:59 PM

Dear Steph,

Well to be honest with you, friend, I was a bit worried about you with your recent setback (brain necrosis, etc), and frankly I am mighty relieved to hear about your return to NED. It takes a special person to cross the distant survival goals, and clearly you are one of them. Thank you for your gift of encouraging the rest of us along this journey. (and enjoy your chocolate! God willing, your next onc will be even more supportive...I can bet that he will enjoy reading your medical record!)
Love Kim from CT

StephN · 07-17-2006, 10:38 PM

Well, my new med onc is a SHE, and a mightly fine doctor. Well known in the cutting edge circles and I feel confident in her ability to keep me NED and to treat me if the beast returns.

She co-wrote a book on exercise and breast cancer that is worthwhile reading.
Titled "Breast Fitness."

Yes, the chocolate helped. It was also a pleasant temperature here today.

Maggie · 07-18-2006, 04:34 AM

Steph,

I'm so glad you have found a new onc already! That's comforting news, I'm sure!
Congratulations on NED! More terrific news!

Maggie

IRENE FROM TAMPA · 07-18-2006, 04:45 AM

I lost my onc. a year ago to a transfer she took in San Antonia. Great opportunity for her, but sad for me.

I have to say that I still email her (can you believe she gave me her email as busy as she is. She is heading the San Antonio Cancer Research Center so I know her time is limited.

Whenever I have a moment when I am getting scared and worried (which seems to be a lot lately) I email her and she responds to me instantly. Example, on Saturday (Saturday mind you)
I emailed her to get her advice on future treatments, and within one hour she had emailed me back. This women also has a life at home, but somehow she manages to remember her "friends" -which we became.

I think she is amazing and I truly miss her but feel so fortunate to have crossed paths with her.

So I know what you are feeling

I am so happy to hear that you are doing so well. Keep up the good work.

madubois63 · 07-18-2006, 05:33 AM

Steph - NED, NED, NED!!! How wonderful!!!! I hope the new doctor is as confident in you as your old onc (and us too)...Keep doing what you do best and proving all those stats wrong!!!!

07-18-2006, 06:05 AM

Great news Steph, and also good that you found a new onc that you feel comfortable with.

May NED be with you for a long time to come.

Kaye · 07-18-2006, 06:41 AM

Sorry to hear that you are losing you onc, Steph. Hopefully, you will develop just as good a relationship with your new one and feel just as comfortable, if not even more...
Do you know where your 'old' onc is relocating for the benefit of anyone else who might be near her?
Take care and wishing you all the best!

StephN · 07-18-2006, 11:04 AM

Hey Kaye -
Guess I might have mentioned that my onc is going to Tucson to the University of Arizona (medical center, I presume). He will be starting there Oct. 1. If anyone in Arizona or thereabouts wants his name, email me directly.
Looks like he will be a "big cheese" there.

RobinP · 07-18-2006, 02:49 PM

I know how it feels, a bit bewildering, to loose your oncologist. I have lost mine too lately as he moved. Now I need a replacement. Luckily, there is one in the area that I heard is very good, and I am hoping for the best with him. I wish you the best with your new onocologist too Steph.

michele u · 07-18-2006, 09:18 PM

Steph, I'm so happy things are going well for you. I'm coming in August I hope i can see you!

Chelee · 07-19-2006, 12:02 AM

Steph, It must be so hard to have him leave. Sounds like your oncologist really knew his stuff. That is awesome that you have been NED for the last four years. Your onc has the magic touch.

I think if I was you...I would ask him where he is moving too and FOLLOW HIM. LOL

To find a oncologist that you can trust and you know is in your corner with you...is worth a million bucks. I see you already have a new onc doc. I hope she will be just as great as your last one. Sounds like your already happy with her...that is excellent.

Wishing you all the best!

And continued years of NED forever!

Chelee