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Re: Do you ever stop thinking about cancer?
I think about cancer every day. Several times a day. It just pops up. I think of the lessons I've learned and I smile. I think of the friends I've made that I'd never have met otherwise, and I smile.
I talk to my body. Several times every single day. I remind myself to be, or try to be, STRONG, BRAVE and DETERMINED. I inform my body, and the Universe -- HEALTHY AND WELL. NO MORE CANCER.
I've been saying that since around April of '99. I had metastasized in '98. I started out at 4th stage, w/2 out of 21 lymph nodes involved. They didn't test for HER2 in '95. In '98 when I recurred, throughout my liver, I asked to be tested, even though Herceptin was still in clinical trials. I'd been reading up.
I was found to be HER2+ 80% (which is how they staged it back then). 1 mnth later, Herceptin was fast-tracked out of clinical trials and made available for metastatic bcers. LUCKY ME! I stayed on H for 10 yrs.
Been off for 6 years!
Stable for 15 yrs.
Yes, I think about cancer everyday. Which is when I spring into action and remind myself to be Strong, Brave and Determined. And then I emphatically tell my body -- HEALTHY AND WELL! NOOO MORE CANCER! And I smile...
Stick with positive. I can't help myself.
Wishing you joy and wellness!
Andi
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Andi BB
'95 post-meno dx Invasive LOBULAR w/9cm tumor! YIKES + 2/21 nodes. Clear mammo 10 mnths earlier. Mastec/tram flap reconst/PORT/8 mnths chemo (4Adria/8CMF). Borderline ER/PR. Tamoxifen 2 yrs. Felt BLESSED. I could walk and talk, feed and bathe myself! I KNEW I would survive...
'98 -- multiple mets to liver. HER2+ 80%. ER/PR- Raging, highly aggressive tumors spreading fast. New PORT. 9 mnths Taxotere Fought fire w/fire! Pronounced in cautious remission 5/99. Taxotere weekly for 6 wks, 2 wks off -- for 9 mnths. TALK ABOUT GRUELING! (I believe they've altered that protocol since those days -- sure hope so!!)
+ good old Vit H wkly for 1st 3 yrs, then triple dosage ev 3 wks for 7 yrs more... The "easy" chemo, right?! Not a walk in the park, but not a freight train coming at 'ya either...
Added Herceptin Nov '98 (6 wks after FDA fast-tracked it for met bc). Stayed w/Vit H till July '08! Now I AM FREE! Humbly and eternally grateful for this life-saving drug! NED since '99 and planning on keeping it that way. To hell w/poor prognosis and nasty stats! STOPPED VIT H JULY '08...! REMAIN STABLE... Eternally grateful...Yes is a world & in this world of yes live (skillfully curled) all worlds ... (e e cummings) EVERY DAY I BEAT MY PREVIOUS RECORD FOR # OF CONSECUTIVE DAYS I'VE STAYED ALIVE. Smile KNOWING you too can be a miracle. Up to me and God now...
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