I'm helplessly Drowning in a Sea of Pink

[Jen]

That pretty much sums up how I feel this month. I feel so helpless as I stand by and watch this disease literally kill my Mom who has fought so hard for so long. I ask myself WHY....why MY Mom? Mom always wondered if she would have been able to get Herceptin BEFORE she had a reoccurance things might have ended up differently. I read statuses of other members here who are stage4 some were diagnosed b4 my Mom and some are even NED and although I don't begrudge any of you your health part of me wonders why (you) and not my Mom because she is just as deserving. People tell me I need to pray to God for strength which I think is a bunch of melarchy as he couldn't even give my Mom the strength to beat this terrible disease.