Emotions out of whack

kvogler · 11-17-2012, 07:01 PM

My surgery is approaching soon and I'm emotional. I finished 6 rounds of chemo beforehand. I don't know if my emotions are fear of the surgery, hormones being out of whack, being tired from chemo or what. Today was a joyless day. Mentally I know I still have things to be thankful for but emotionally, I can't get it together. Starting to wonder if I need some meds to help. Then, now I'm scared of taking anything for fear of messing up treatment or causing a new cancer. How long should I try to see it through before asking for medicinal help? Hoping these blahs will pass naturally. Have any of you taken anything to help with nerves during treatment? If so, what? Any side effects?

LoisLane · 11-17-2012, 07:42 PM

Hi Kvogler. I am sorry you are having such a hard time right now. I remember well the fear
and anxiety that goes with this stupid diagnosis. I am so glad to hear you are finished your
chemo, that is a big hurdle to get over. As far as medication to help you through this difficult time of course you should see you doctor in this regard. I would think most
women have taken or are still taking an anti-anxiety pill of some sort. I had taken
Ativan for years and it was really important to have that to take the edge off and
give me a feeling of calm so I could face things in a more relaxed manner. You are right
in the middle of treatment now and this is a when we do need some help in coping
at times. I remember when I was in the early stages of treatment I was also afraid
about anything interfering with treatment or causing recurrence. You are very brave
and have done so much already. You need to give yourself a break and ask for some
help from your family physician or oncologist about the anxiety. They will only
prescribe meds that would definitely not interefere with any other medications you
are taking. I am thinking of you dear because I remember four years ago I was
exactly were you were but it does get way better and each hurdle you get over you
look back and will be very proud of yourself. Lois

Mary Anne in TX · 11-17-2012, 09:19 PM

Ask for help and let them tell you what is ok and what is not. Be where and who you are and ask for what you need. Wherever the fear and anxiety come from doesn't matter so much as that for you to know that it seems to hit us all at the most inopportune time. For me it was having my silly port out. Had it not been for a very wonderful wise friend who went with me, I probably would have never showed up!
There are a lot of wonderful warriors that will pray for you and love you through each step. Be ok with needing help. Sometimes it takes more courage to ask for help than to stand alone.

conomyself · 11-18-2012, 08:11 AM

My therapist specializes in neuro-linguistic programming techniques and early on in my cancer "journey" had me start using this simple and effective technique:

1) Relax the best you can, and think of all of the people who care about you and love you.

2) Take a deep breath, and breathe all of this love into you. As you do this, press your thumb and finger together (I do it on both hands at the same time). Feel the sense of well-being flood your body.

3) Pressing your same thumb and finger together is now your trigger. Any time you do this the sense of well-being will return. The more you do it the stronger it gets. Use it at least once daily.

I have had good results with just this simple technique. Sometimes when wake up at night worrying I can use the trigger and fall back to sleep. I hope you feel better soon. (((Hugs)))

Rachael

sarah · 11-18-2012, 08:42 AM

Hello Kvogler,
Waves of anxiety, fear have hit us all at times during this journey.
Immediately let your doctor know how you're feeling and ask for something for the anxiety. You may even ask about going on an anti-depression pill for a limited time but that takes time to work whereas an anti-anxiety pill will work quickly. When I had my recurrence, I often took an anti-anxiety pill (I think it was a generic xanax) before tests. it was a white pill with 4 tiny parts to it. I took one part if I was just a little anxious or more if I was extremely anxious. There are also some natural herb pills - in France they are very popular and sometimes I'd take that instead. I was pretty freaked out by my recurrence unlike the first time around.
don't fight it, you don't have to suffer more - in fact I believe strongly that added stress and pain is detrimental so definitely ask for help immediately.
take care
big hug, you'll get through it. Of course you're exhausted from chemo and that doesn't help.
love sarah

sassy · 11-18-2012, 03:54 PM

Going through everything related to cancer is tough and I would say a large percentage of those who have traveled this journey have needed some type of help getting through the toughest times.

I used Ativan on an as needed basis to help me deal with the toughest times and as importantly to get much needed sleep and rest. I didn't worry about developing an dependency, I could take it and still have my wits about me, but it would take the edge off and helped me feel less anxious and more able to cope.

Please don't hesitate to discuss your feelings and emotions with your doctor.

kvogler · 11-18-2012, 06:48 PM

Thanks for the support. You guys have helped me decide to bring up this topic to my doctor. Where I'm from, the mental side of health is still kinda "hush, hush."

KsGal · 11-20-2012, 12:48 AM

(hugs) We have to treat the whole body, not just the cancer. Definitely talk to your doctor about it. Meds have helped me a lot with these issues, but I know there are other ways to deal with these things as well. Sending you lots of healing prayers.

sarah · 11-20-2012, 02:55 AM

would you feel more comfortable talking to a female doctor about these issues? A female GP? I've been going to a female GP for about 20 years now ever since I had a pain in my neck (seriously!) and my male GP ignored it until one year (I saw him only once a year) he said oh I see you've been complaining about this for 6 years!!! then he took notice and it was solved but I said to myself, Sarah you idiot, 6 years!!! change doctors now and I did and they were the ones who found my cancer, who listened and acted on what I told them. I decided male doctors think we're all hypochondriacs. So consider having a woman on your team if you don't already. However my lead oncologist is an elderly man and I adore him!
hugs and love
sarah

mamacze · 11-20-2012, 06:51 AM

kvogler,
I agree with all that is said and ponder, why do we doubt ourselves and our own innate wisdom? You know yourself, you have wisdom from the year of your experience and now the collective wisdom of at least this group. Listen to your body; go to the practitioners you trust and ask for help. Ativan has also helped me but it is not for everyone - see what your doctor recommends. stay with us and let us know how it works out.
XOXO Kim (from CT)