[tammymarie1971]

Thank you to all beautiful ladies for responding to my "need encouragement" thread! I was able to get treatment yesterday as well as a blood transfusion which has given me some energy today! I am so grateful to those who give blood! Last night however was a nightmare...I had decided a few days ago to stop taking pain meds.. slow release morphine and faster acting dilaudid...Well I felt like I could just crawl right out of my skin..it was awful I had to keep rocking and pacing I wanted to smash my head into the wall!! My arms couldn't keep still..I was in pure agony..not pain but i just wanted to jump out of my crawling skin!!My poor husband didn't know what to do...He went on the internet and discovered that I was going through withdrawl!! I than took a dilaudid and one of the slow release morphines and made myself cream of wheat at 5am and started to feel human after awhile...I never want to go through that again!!! Who knew that after only a couple of months your body becomes so dependant, well I guess if I would of if I had given some thought to it I might of realized. DUH!!!..So I will ,continue with the pain meds at a reduced dosage I just don't think I need as much anymore. My GP also prescribed xanax for three times a day to help with anxiety which i think is better than the ups and downs of ativan wearing off, taking more, having it wear off etc etc...I think the steady stream of a light dose should probably work better..
Anyway I guess I learned not to stop taking anything cold turkey...It was shear torment!!
Hugs to you all my fellow sisters!!
Tammy

I still can't figure out how to update my signature, but I will keep trying..