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Old 01-19-2012, 09:47 AM   #16
chrisy
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Join Date: Sep 2005
Location: Central Coast, CA
Posts: 3,207
Re: 8 weeks, 8 new spots in Brain = 15 rounds WBR

Dear Jessica,

"I keep saying "I just want it to be over," but truly, I'm not sure what I mean by that.
This is so hard."

That does resonate - you've been in this marathon for SO LONG, longer than most and probably longer than even you imagined. I think you don't need to know what you mean by that, especially in the heat of this moment. That feeling is just your reality right now - and you don't know what tomorrow will bring. I saw such a zest for life in you when we met in San Antonio - and I sense this is the "real" Jessica.

For now try to surrender that doubt and fear, and fatigue. Know that there are many who are there to love and support you - including your outstanding medical team.

with hugs and much much love,
Chris
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Chris in Scotts Valley
June 2002 extensive hi grade DCIS (pre-cancer-stage 0, clean sentinal node) Mastectomy/implant - no chemo, rads. "cured?"
9/2004 Diag: Stage IV extensive liver mets (!) ER/PR- Her2+++
10/04-3/05 Weekly Taxol/Carboplatin/Herceptin , complete response!
04/05 - 4/07 Herception every 3 wks, Continue NED
04/07 - recurrence to liver - 2 spots, starting tykerb/avastin trial
06/07 8/07 10/07 Scans show stable, continue on Tykerb/Avastin
01/08 Progression in liver
02/08 Begin (TDM1) trial
08/08 NED! It's Working! Continue on TDM1
02/09 Continue NED
02/10 Continue NED. 5/10 9/10 Scans NED 10/10 Scans NED
12/10 Scans not clear....4/11 Scans suggest progression 6/11 progression confirmed in liver
07/11 - 11/11 Herceptin/Xeloda -not working:(
12/11 Begin MM302 Phase I trial - bust:(
03/12 3rd times the charm? AKT trial

5/12 Scan shows reduction! 7/12 More reduction!!!!
8/12 Whoops...progression...trying for Perjeta/Herceptin (plus some more nasty chemo!)
9/12 Start Perjeta/Herceptin, chemo on hold due to infection/wound in leg, added on cycle 2 &3
11/12 Poops! progression in liver, Stop Perjeta/Taxo/Herc
11/12 Navelbine/Herce[ptin - try for a 3 cycles, no go.
2/13 Gemzar/Carbo/Herceptin - no go.
3/13 TACE procedure
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