Emelie,
If being burden to family is indeed true, dealing with burden at this time could well prepare family members for coping with same should even greater affliction happen later in life.
No stone should remain unturned in your quest to receive latest state-of-the-art medication, even ones not approved as yet. The following link points to an article of a dying mom who was successful in convincing Genentech to provide her with Pertuzumab,
http://www.facebook.com/#!/LindaHurtadoWFTS
An all out effort to request Genentech provide you with both Pertuzumab and T-DM1 investigational drugs, 3rd arm of Marianne phaseIII trial, should be seriously taken under consideration. If company was willing to do it for one, groundwork should be in place to build on that.