[chekmark]

Tracy,
I understand exactly how you are feeling. When I lost my hair on top of loosing a breast I would refer to myself as a freak show. My husband would get so frustrated when I would say that but that is exactly how I felt. I did not mind the looks but the people that would stare would just infuriate me and I would have to bite my tongue. Now that my hair is growing back and I have reconstruction scheduled for Dec. 9th I feel somewhat better but I still go to that dark place once in awhile. Some people cope very well with their mastectomies and others not so well. We are all different.I always said when I was growing up that if I ever got breast cancer I would not hesitate to have a mastectomy and then it happened and I have different feelings. Not that I regret getting rid of the cancer but a piece of my body is missing and I hate it. We just learn to live with the hand that has been dealt to us and try to move on. It has been almost a year since this all started for me and I still struggle so what you are feeling is normal. Family support is important so I hope that gets resolved for you. One day at a time, one foot in front of the other. Stay strong and one day this will all be over and you will hopefully say, that wasn't so bad. I only know a few people that have had reconstruction and they look good and wear whatever they want. The only people that know they had reconstruction is that person and their families. No one else notices. Take care and good luck. Blessings, Darlene