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Lee, I think the post treatment blues are a combination of suddenly not having anything to "do" - no warrior stuff - and at the same time having the emotions, fears, and whatever other emotional baggage has been put on the back burner come back now that the crisis if past. Post traumatic stress.
So, it's totally normal and you've really hit on some good thoughts in your analysis of it.
As for being in limbo-land, it will over time subside. You and Colleen will put this behind you and one day you'll realize you totally forgot to worry about cancer yesterday!
Most people I think find they need to pull back from thinking about cancer all the time as a necessary part of moving on with life. That is why those who stay around to continue encouraging us are so precious. They certainly pay a price and I am so grateful for them.
Heck, I'll ALWAYS be staring cancer down, but even I still need to take breaks and in fact one of my goals is to take a week off from cancer every month. We'll see how that goes! You know that saying about how to make God laugh (tell him your plans...)
Anyway, Lee, you and Colleen have been very active in your fight. Now its time for action-guy to "do" re-entry into post cancer life for you both! I have the utmost confidence in your ability to do this - with much enthusiasm!
Take care
chris
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Chris in Scotts Valley
June 2002 extensive hi grade DCIS (pre-cancer-stage 0, clean sentinal node) Mastectomy/implant - no chemo, rads. "cured?"
9/2004 Diag: Stage IV extensive liver mets (!) ER/PR- Her2+++
10/04-3/05 Weekly Taxol/Carboplatin/Herceptin , complete response!
04/05 - 4/07 Herception every 3 wks, Continue NED
04/07 - recurrence to liver - 2 spots, starting tykerb/avastin trial
06/07 8/07 10/07 Scans show stable, continue on Tykerb/Avastin
01/08 Progression in liver
02/08 Begin (TDM1) trial
08/08 NED! It's Working! Continue on TDM1
02/09 Continue NED
02/10 Continue NED. 5/10 9/10 Scans NED 10/10 Scans NED
12/10 Scans not clear....4/11 Scans suggest progression 6/11 progression confirmed in liver
07/11 - 11/11 Herceptin/Xeloda -not working:(
12/11 Begin MM302 Phase I trial - bust:(
03/12 3rd times the charm? AKT trial
5/12 Scan shows reduction! 7/12 More reduction!!!!
8/12 Whoops...progression...trying for Perjeta/Herceptin (plus some more nasty chemo!)
9/12 Start Perjeta/Herceptin, chemo on hold due to infection/wound in leg, added on cycle 2 &3
11/12 Poops! progression in liver, Stop Perjeta/Taxo/Herc
11/12 Navelbine/Herce[ptin - try for a 3 cycles, no go.
2/13 Gemzar/Carbo/Herceptin - no go.
3/13 TACE procedure
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