[Westcoastgirl]

Hi Skip,
I am up here in Canada so things are slightly different but I know you have similar organizations in the states. When I was first diagnosed I phoned our Cancer Agency and asked to be included in a program they call Cancer Connections, where you are matched with a cancer volunteer that calls you and can talk with you for as long as you want. I have been told you have the same program in the states. I was matched with several women that had the same diagnosis as me and were long time survivors....the longer the better. They searched all of Canada to find what I wanted. I have been in contact with one woman for over a year. She calls me regularly and I have found her a huge inspiration as her bc was far more serious than mine. I am sure this would help your wife. She needs to know that there is hope. Lee, known as Colleen's husband, my husband and I found to be an inspiration at the beginning of this journey. He was able to put all the information out there into proper perspective for us. I posted here and asked for those women that were survivors to write to me. I got tons of responses. I think one woman asked me to search "Dancing with Ned" (no evidence of disease). I know there is one thread right now that has asked for good news. Perhaps you could post in the Herceptin section and you will find many more women with much more to offer will respond to you. If you read the postings here and look at their signatures (the part at the end that you have now added) you will see that there are tons of women that are stage 3 and 4 that are here and have been doing well for a very long time. I am good friends with a woman that is stage 4 colon cancer that has gone to her liver. Her treatment has brought her tumor markers from a huge number down to within normal. I have another friend stage 4 ovarian cancer that has also brought her tumor markers back to normal with treatment. I could go on and on with those stories, really. I have read over and over that liver mets are treatable. The liver can regenerate itself and often the mets will encapsulize and can be operated on or sometimes just simply turn into scar tissue. There is so much to live for and hope for in your wife's case. It seems to me in my readings that the liver is often the first place that they find mets and your wife's other tests were clean which is wonderful. She truly has much to hope for. The Healing Journey by Alastair Cunningham is available on line for free and the author that I love is Bernie Siegel. He wrote Love, Medicine, and Miracles amongst many books and it was before Herceptin so now there is even more reason to believe that your wife will live to enjoy old age with you. I do encourage you to go to the Herceptin section and ask for women that are stage 3 and 4 to write to you and you will see as I keep repeating....there is much to hope for, much to help you feel positive. I did suffer a lot with pain but that is all over now and it helped to know that each time it got easier. It also helped to know why I had pain. My husband has found this much harder to deal with than me, has suffered a lot with anxiety so I suggest to you that you need support in all of this as well. I often think as the one with bc I have little choice but to move forward with treatment, pretty black and white but my husband often feels helpless and I have come to see the care giver's job is very, very tough. I did not like my onc at all at first. I found him cold and distant and I was vulnerable and scared. As I said I began to keep records of all tests, blood work, etc and it made me feel more in control. I grew to like my onc after many months and came to appreciate that he quoted research as that is what it all comes down to doesn't it. Please reach out to others on here in the Herceptin section and you will find so many that have come so far and it will give you the hope you need. Take care.