[Lucy]

I agree with what the others have said - what you're feeling is normal.

I was diagnosed with cancer in January of this year but I've also been a caregiver to a cancer patient and I have to say, caregiver is the harder, more stressful job - at least for me.

For me, being a patient has been more of a passive role so to speak in that I'm told where to be and what I need and I do it, the only action on my part is to follow directions. Whereas the caregiver role is more of an active role (what do you need, what can I do, let me do this, etc.). You're constantly trying to anticipate and act on the needs of the patient. It's very draining and taxing on the person. Almost everything you do is directed at seeing to someone else's needs and yours go unmet, if that makes sense. Rhondalea is right, you need respite. If you get help and take a bit of a break, you'll likely feel guilty for even wanting the break but it's still very important. If you're feeling drained and exhausted all the time you're not being the best support you can be for your wife and you need to be, for both of your sakes.

I wish you all the best and hope you can get what you need.