HER2 Support Group Forums - View Single Post - More discussion about balancing vitamin D and minerals

AlaskaAngel · 01-03-2008, 11:59 AM

Janet, I don't know where I was, but I must not have understood or missed figuring out what Second Life was. Thanks for suggesting it again.

When a person starts treatment like chemo, they don't realize how drastically different their life is going to be, or realize just how much that long period of dealing with treatment colors their outlook over time. Everybody handles that differently, some more successfully than others. There is a lot of cheerleading support for being brave, but almost no support for finding ways to get back some of the pure joy of being human.

What I think is so poorly understood is that reduced levels of estrogen cause reduced levels of libido, and just like with any other physiologic change, the feelings and thoughts are based on that very real change in how the body is functioning -- not just on the ugliness of cancer or treatment. Those who have never gone through toxic treatment have no real comprehension of the difference. They tend to think of it as just being a depressing experience.

Unfortunately when most people talk about libido they think about it very narrowly, almost exclusively in the sexual context. But libido is the capacity for enjoyment of life.... or, as it is defined in wikipedia:

"Libido in its common usage means sexual desire; however, more technical definitions, such as those found in the work of Carl Jung, are more general, referring to libido as the free creative—or psychic—energy an individual has to put toward personal development or individuation."

The depression that comes with bc is almost always explained away as being due to fear of bc or fear of treatment or self-reproach for the weight that has been gained or the loss of breasts, etc. But a good part of the depression is due to the loss of estrogen. As long as caregivers and patients are blind to that, the only available standard remedies will be to "have faith", "think positive", and/or to "take medications". Those are each important ways of dealing with depression, but IMHO, being as open as possible to alternative ways to learn to "play" again, or to have "the free creative--or psychic--energy" makes a pretty big difference too.

Sadly, those who dole out difficult treatments have been so focused on saving lives that they haven't done the research on libido to find possible ways for us to cope or to get any libido back. Instead they figure that is our problem and mostly wash their hands of it without ever preparing us to deal with it. But more recently in the last 2 years there seems to be more of a professional approach and awareness, and the start of more research about it.

I know there is a trial using pilocarpine to see if that helps with the dryness.

I personally wonder if some of the problem has to do with the loss of our pheromones, and wish someone in research would investigate that.

AlaskaAngel

01-03-2008, 11:59 AM	#10
AlaskaAngel Senior Member Join Date: Sep 2005 Location: Alaska Posts: 2,018	Loss of libido Janet, I don't know where I was, but I must not have understood or missed figuring out what Second Life was. Thanks for suggesting it again. When a person starts treatment like chemo, they don't realize how drastically different their life is going to be, or realize just how much that long period of dealing with treatment colors their outlook over time. Everybody handles that differently, some more successfully than others. There is a lot of cheerleading support for being brave, but almost no support for finding ways to get back some of the pure joy of being human. What I think is so poorly understood is that reduced levels of estrogen cause reduced levels of libido, and just like with any other physiologic change, the feelings and thoughts are based on that very real change in how the body is functioning -- not just on the ugliness of cancer or treatment. Those who have never gone through toxic treatment have no real comprehension of the difference. They tend to think of it as just being a depressing experience. Unfortunately when most people talk about libido they think about it very narrowly, almost exclusively in the sexual context. But libido is the capacity for enjoyment of life.... or, as it is defined in wikipedia: "Libido in its common usage means sexual desire; however, more technical definitions, such as those found in the work of Carl Jung, are more general, referring to libido as the free creative—or psychic—energy an individual has to put toward personal development or individuation." The depression that comes with bc is almost always explained away as being due to fear of bc or fear of treatment or self-reproach for the weight that has been gained or the loss of breasts, etc. But a good part of the depression is due to the loss of estrogen. As long as caregivers and patients are blind to that, the only available standard remedies will be to "have faith", "think positive", and/or to "take medications". Those are each important ways of dealing with depression, but IMHO, being as open as possible to alternative ways to learn to "play" again, or to have "the free creative--or psychic--energy" makes a pretty big difference too. Sadly, those who dole out difficult treatments have been so focused on saving lives that they haven't done the research on libido to find possible ways for us to cope or to get any libido back. Instead they figure that is our problem and mostly wash their hands of it without ever preparing us to deal with it. But more recently in the last 2 years there seems to be more of a professional approach and awareness, and the start of more research about it. I know there is a trial using pilocarpine to see if that helps with the dryness. I personally wonder if some of the problem has to do with the loss of our pheromones, and wish someone in research would investigate that. AlaskaAngel