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Old 06-10-2017, 09:20 AM   #7
Vickilapp
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Join Date: Jan 2016
Posts: 9
Re: Did you have surgery w/o doing chemo?

Dear Waterdreamer,
In reading your profile and your post, my heart goes out to you for all that you have gone through. I can see from your picture with your beautiful children that you have a precious reason to live.

Thank you for sharing your experience, feelings about your implants, and your regrets about not doing chemo earlier. It is very helpful for me to hear this as I evaluate my decisions. I may not have the statistics to help me make decisions, but hearing other people's stories helps me a lot.

When I got the recurrence, I felt regret about not doing radiation, not giving myself regular self-examinations even while I was on treatment, and falling off the wagon with regard to my good diet. When I shared these regrets with a friend, she refused to let me wallow in my regret, telling me that she believed that I made the decisions that were right for me, and don't beat myself up with these self-criticisms. That felt affirming for me.

As I have gotten additional feedback about the factors that may have allowed the recurrence, I wish that I had gotten 2nd opinions about next steps when the I didn't have clear margins from the 1st surgery. My oncologist recommended going on Kadcyla (TDM-1) to clear up the remaining cancer, and that seemed like a good way to go. Since the recurrence, I have had people tell me that I should have gotten another surgery to deal with the margins after the 1st surgery, rather than go on Kadcyla.

I hope you can forgive yourself for your choices, I know that you did the best you could that resonated with your values and beliefs. It is not easy making decisions about how to deal with these things. It has helped me to affirm that in spite of appearances, something wonderful is going to come out of this situation.

At this point for me, all the options that I feel like I am faced with involve some kind of loss that I don't want to have. Mastectomy: loss of my breast & my physical beauty. Reconstruction: loss of naturalness, with having something artificial in my body, plus setting myself up for future surgery. Chemotherapy: loss of my good health, and nerve damage. Natural remedies: risk of spreading rather than retreating of the disease. I want to keep bringing my spirituality into the picture to guide my choices. It helps a lot to hear other people's experiences. Thank you for sharing yours.

Vicki
__________________
Sept 2015: diagnosed with stage 2b breast cancer. 5.5cm tumor in left breast.
Oct 2015: began neoadjuvant infusions of herceptin and perjeta. Reduced tumor.
May 2016: lumpectomy. Didn't get clear margins.
June 2016: began Kadcyla TDM-1.
October 2016: clear PET scan. No evidence of malignancy
Oct 2016-Feb 2017: continued on Kadcyla.
Feb 2017: began Herceptin only.
May 2017: found new lump. MRI shows multi-focal 5+cm.
May 2017: began taking Artemisinin (500mg 2x/day), graviola (1300mg 2x/day, plus evening tea), CBD oil (80mg in evening), Pau D'Arco.
June 2017: in addition to above herbal medicines, added Mistletoe (orally with tincture), Turmeric, Tibetan herbs.
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