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Believe51 · 05-27-2010, 07:27 AM

It is with spinal chills and tears that I feel when I log in once again that prove this is home. I check in from time to time but the pain keeps me speechless. As time goes by it is harder and harder to 'Believe' he is gone. I am doing well and have a Facebook account that recites the every day wonder in my life. Although I have lost my favorite person my life has never been so rich. I thank him daily for the wonderful person he helped mould into a tougher cookie than she was. I am living with a man I dated 21+ years ago and we are doing well.

But there is only one place that I can come that I can truly cry.....it is here...it is with you! I have missed the board but again cannot speak. I have been grant writing for the foundation AND Her2support for some time now and even though moving through phase 2, still not getting paid. We are viable though and have helped people across the US. I cannot bear the thought of life without fighting cancer.

Doing well health-wise. Yoga, meditation and working out has helped me to become a fierce 120 lbs of mean cancer fighting machine! It helped me to stay strong and endure the fight and now it will help endure new missions.

Oh and cancer.....thought I was gone huh? NOT...silent is deadly and I will spend my life fighting you and fighting for them!!

I LOVE YOU ALL> I am always right here!

THE ONE AND ONLY Believe51~

05-27-2010, 07:27 AM	#1
Believe51 Senior Member Join Date: Jun 2007 Location: RHODE ISLAND (Ed getting me a latte on 2nd Cancerversary Cruise 2008) 'BELIEVE': To accept as true or real, To have faith in, To presume ALWAYS BELIEVE Posts: 2,999	~It is your Believe51 talking~...... It is with spinal chills and tears that I feel when I log in once again that prove this is home. I check in from time to time but the pain keeps me speechless. As time goes by it is harder and harder to 'Believe' he is gone. I am doing well and have a Facebook account that recites the every day wonder in my life. Although I have lost my favorite person my life has never been so rich. I thank him daily for the wonderful person he helped mould into a tougher cookie than she was. I am living with a man I dated 21+ years ago and we are doing well. But there is only one place that I can come that I can truly cry.....it is here...it is with you! I have missed the board but again cannot speak. I have been grant writing for the foundation AND Her2support for some time now and even though moving through phase 2, still not getting paid. We are viable though and have helped people across the US. I cannot bear the thought of life without fighting cancer. Doing well health-wise. Yoga, meditation and working out has helped me to become a fierce 120 lbs of mean cancer fighting machine! It helped me to stay strong and endure the fight and now it will help endure new missions. Oh and cancer.....thought I was gone huh? NOT...silent is deadly and I will spend my life fighting you and fighting for them!! I LOVE YOU ALL> I am always right here! THE ONE AND ONLY Believe51~ __________________ 9/7/06Husband 50yrs=StageIV IBC/HER2+,BoneMets10/06TaxotereX10,'H'1X wk,Zometa,Tamoxifen4/12/07Last Tax5/18/07Pet=Rapid Cell Activity,No Organ Mets,Lytic Lesions,Degeneration,Some Bone Repair5/07ChemoFail6/01/07Pleural Thoracentisis=Effusions,NoMalignantCells6/19/07+7/2/07DFCI 6/25/07BrainMRI=BrainMets,Many<9mm7/10/07WBR/PelvisRad37.5Gx15&Nutritionist8/19/07T/X9/20/07BrainMRI=2<2mm10/6/07Pet=BoneProgression 10/24/07ChemoFail11/9/07A/Cx10,EndTam12/7/07Faslodex12/10/07Muga7512/13/07BlasticLesions1/7/08BrainMRI=Clear4/1/08Pet=BoneImprovement, NoProgression,Stable4/7/08BrainPerfect5/16/08Last A/C8/26/08BrainMets=10(<9mm)9/10/08Gamma10/30/08Met=5mm12/19/08Gamma5mets5 12/22/08SpinalMets1/14/09SpinalRads2/17/09BrainMRI=NoNewMets4/20/09BoneScan5/14/09Ixempra6/1/09BrainMRI=NumerousMets6/24/09DFCIw/DrBurstein6/26/09Continue Ixempra/Faslodex/Zometa~TM now lower7/17/09Stop Ixempra By Choice9/21/09HOSPICE10/16/09Earned His Deserved Wings And Halo=37 Month Fight w/Stage 4 IBC, Her2+++,My Hero!!