HER2 Support Group Forums - View Single Post - Life Insurance, can we get more than 4 times salary?

StephN · 08-18-2006, 02:45 PM

Hi Sherry -
I can very well understand your feelings at being "overlooked" on the life insurance renewal. Maybe it was an inadvertant oversight, but that does not make us feel any better.

Most people do not realize that when it comes out that we have cancer and are in danger of losing our life, we suddenly become seen in a different light by all kinds of people. We are sensitive to the changes in attitude from our friends, family and acquaintences. Even though we have a lot of HOPE for ourselves, we have to survive for a long period of time for people to get back to acting the anywhere like same around us. Or there is always the little formality of asking how we are doing and complementing us on how "good" we are looking. Then the occasion can proceed and the cancer can be forgotten. But there is always the disease inserted into every situation we enter.

Having this come out in a marriage this way, Sherry, drives home this syndrome in an almost shocking way. We need support from our husbands, and not to get to feeling like we are just something like an old golf club that needs repair and forgotten in a corner. We need to feel loved and worthwhile as part of our strength to battle this disease.

Enjoy your little daughter feed off of her love as much as you ever did. She is entering years where you can do even more with her.

Like Sandy says, the money will come from somewhere when it is needed - don't bother your pretty head over it.

08-18-2006, 02:45 PM	#6
StephN Senior Member Join Date: Nov 2004 Location: Misty woods of WA State Posts: 4,128	"Untouchable syndrome" Hi Sherry - I can very well understand your feelings at being "overlooked" on the life insurance renewal. Maybe it was an inadvertant oversight, but that does not make us feel any better. Most people do not realize that when it comes out that we have cancer and are in danger of losing our life, we suddenly become seen in a different light by all kinds of people. We are sensitive to the changes in attitude from our friends, family and acquaintences. Even though we have a lot of HOPE for ourselves, we have to survive for a long period of time for people to get back to acting the anywhere like same around us. Or there is always the little formality of asking how we are doing and complementing us on how "good" we are looking. Then the occasion can proceed and the cancer can be forgotten. But there is always the disease inserted into every situation we enter. Having this come out in a marriage this way, Sherry, drives home this syndrome in an almost shocking way. We need support from our husbands, and not to get to feeling like we are just something like an old golf club that needs repair and forgotten in a corner. We need to feel loved and worthwhile as part of our strength to battle this disease. Enjoy your little daughter feed off of her love as much as you ever did. She is entering years where you can do even more with her. Like Sandy says, the money will come from somewhere when it is needed - don't bother your pretty head over it. __________________ "When I hear music, I fear no danger. I am invulnerable. I see no foe. I am related to the earliest times, and to the latest." H.D. Thoreau Live in the moment. MY STORY SO FAR ~~~~ Found suspicious lump 9/2000 Lumpectomy, then node dissection and port placement Stage IIB, 8 pos nodes of 18, Grade 3, ER & PR - Adriamycin 12 weekly, taxotere 4 rounds 36 rads - very little burning 3 mos after rads liver full of tumors, Stage IV Jan 2002, one spot on sternum Weekly Taxol, Navelbine, Herceptin for 27 rounds to NED! 2003 & 2004 no active disease - 3 weekly Herceptin + Zometa Jan 2005 two mets to brain - Gamma Knife on Jan 18 All clear until treated cerebellum spot showing activity on Jan 2006 brain MRI & brain PET Brain surgery on Feb 9, 2006 - no cancer, 100% radiation necrosis - tumor was still dying Continue as NED while on Herceptin & quarterly Zometa Fall-2006 - off Zometa - watching one small brain spot (scar?) 2007 - spot/scar in brain stable - finished anticoagulation therapy for clot along my port-a-catheter - 3 angioplasties to unblock vena cava 2008 - Brain and body still NED! Port removed and scans in Dec. Dec 2008 - stop Herceptin - Vaccine Trial at U of W begun in Oct. of 2011 STILL NED everywhere in Feb 2014 - on wing & prayer 7/14 - Started twice yearly Zometa for my bones Jan. 2015 checkup still shows NED 2015 Neuropathy in feet - otherwise all OK - still NED. Same news for 2016 and all of 2017. Nov of 2017 - had small skin cancer removed from my face. Will have Zometa end of Jan. 2018.