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rhondalea · 06-01-2012, 04:50 AM

I'm so happy to hear you enjoyed Paris.

I stayed out of your other thread because I'm extremely conflicted, and I didn't want to hijack the importance of what you were telling us with a long essay of my own. (Most of my posts are irritatingly excessive anyway, but on this topic, I'd have gone on for pages and pages.) I'm not going to subject you to my long-windedness even now, but I did want to tell you how much respect I have for the choice you've made, even though my heart cries out, "don't go yet."

Yesterday, I read another author's essay--"How Doctors Die"--so I thought I would post it here for you, because it says much better than I can how the grown-up part of me feels about the subject. I'm sorry I didn't find it sooner, because it is a balm to the child inside who does not want to say goodbye no matter what.

http://zocalopublicsquare.org/thepub...ie/read/nexus/

I think of you every day, and I wish for you that you will have enough good time to accomplish the goals you set out when you chose this course. I hope that when the day comes that I face the same choice (a given, because with modern medicine, only those who die abruptly can avoid it), I will meet it head on with the same dignity and grace you have shown us here.

06-01-2012, 04:50 AM	#10
rhondalea Senior Member Join Date: Jun 2011 Location: Somerset, NJ Posts: 487	Re: Back from Paris I'm so happy to hear you enjoyed Paris. I stayed out of your other thread because I'm extremely conflicted, and I didn't want to hijack the importance of what you were telling us with a long essay of my own. (Most of my posts are irritatingly excessive anyway, but on this topic, I'd have gone on for pages and pages.) I'm not going to subject you to my long-windedness even now, but I did want to tell you how much respect I have for the choice you've made, even though my heart cries out, "don't go yet." Yesterday, I read another author's essay--"How Doctors Die"--so I thought I would post it here for you, because it says much better than I can how the grown-up part of me feels about the subject. I'm sorry I didn't find it sooner, because it is a balm to the child inside who does not want to say goodbye no matter what. http://zocalopublicsquare.org/thepub...ie/read/nexus/ I think of you every day, and I wish for you that you will have enough good time to accomplish the goals you set out when you chose this course. I hope that when the day comes that I face the same choice (a given, because with modern medicine, only those who die abruptly can avoid it), I will meet it head on with the same dignity and grace you have shown us here. __________________ 2/6/09 Core needle biopsy: negative; Mammos through 2010: no change 3/30/11 Pea-sized lump in left breast at site of prior biopsy; mammo negative, sonogram not so much 4/14/11 Core needle biopsy: negative for cancer 5/18/11 Excisional biopsy 1.2 cm tumor, LVI, positive margin; ER+60%,PR+20%,HER2/CEP17 5 6/15/11 BMX: Left DCIS & LH; Right ADH; SNB: 2/3 nodes: 1.4 cm and 1 mm; ALND L1&2: 0/10; Stage IIa, Grade 3 7/14/11 CT/Bone scans NED; MUGA 66% 7/19/11 Biweekly dd AC w/Neulasta; done 8/30/11 9/13/11 Transfusion (Hemoglobin 8.6); MUGA 64% 9/20/11 Start Taxol + Herceptin; Taxol done 12/6/2011; continue Herceptin until 9/4/2012 12/27/11 Radiation - 6 weeks; 2/27/2012 - DONE! Yayyyy! 2/29/12 Start Tamoxifen 20 mg/day; continue until 2/28/17 5/16/12 Start five-years Metformin trial 6/19/12 MUGA 61% 8/21/12 Brain MRI NED (head still hurts, brain still fogged) 9/4/12 Herceptin done! 9/6/12 Port out! 7/11/13 Aricept 5mg for cognitive impairment; increased to 10mg as of 8/23/13; back to 5mg 12/2013 5/2014 Add Namenda 7mg 9/2014 Stop Aricept and Namenda; Neuropsychological evaluation 10/24/14 Start cognitive rehabilitation therapy