[rosie]

Hi everyone. I could use an objective view here. I am about to attend a big family get together. Some of the guests attending will be a family ( not directly related to me ) who have been unkind to me and my children these last few years. For example, when we were invited to their holiday get together and gift exchange I bought gifts for them and their children while they deliberately excluded us and my children and no other guests were excluded. I don't care about me but my younger son was very sad and as children are so honest, he came right out and asked why they did this to him. He was the only child at the party treated this way.
Then they asked me to send them copies of pictures of their family taken by a photographer at a party we had to which they were invited. At great expense, I paid for a bunch of these professional pictures, sent them and never heard even a word of thanks. She has done many other things that for time and space I won't include.
I am very angry and feel like confronting the mother who bears the most responsibility for this and the other things she has done. I am not doing great and don't believe time is on my side here. I want to be perfectly clear and tell her that since she has not been here during my life, has never called or offered help while I am alive, I don't want her showing up "grieving" at my funeral. Do you think I should be more forgiving or given the fact that it's my life and my death, I have a right to confront her?
I wish I could say I am going to be the bigger person here, but I feel like I have done that these last few years and enough is enough. I know her presence at my funeral would be very upsetting to my husband and I feel like his comfort is more important than her making an appearance.

Help! I am torn!

Thanks for your wise words of wisdom,
Rosie