[Andrea Barnett Budin]

Dear sweet NED TED -- bless you! Midst all you are going through in your life, with darling Denise, with your sons, you have taken the time to give us some understanding of what happened, which we deeply craved. A remarkable man, obviously, and who else would Denise have chosen but a man like YOU!

Your generosity of Spirit touches each of us. I can see Denise scooting (as my husband decided to do when he kept passing out). It's the safest mode of transportation!

Her docs never gave up on her I see, and that is gladdening to my heart. She would never give up, she had a team that would not either! Good job, Denise! Brilliantly thought out and selectively chosen, you surrounded yourself with Ninja docs, of course.

A thunderstorm erupting in her head (yes, we hang on her and your every word, Ned Ted!) -- her descriptive abilities fully in tact and far above the capability of most, even midst her calamity! Denise has never failed to astound us with her tales and depictions, and of course, to make us smile if not snort out loud!

The scene at the front door that you have generously shared with us clutches at my heart and must have scared you tears! A 911 call alone shakes us to the core. And the ambulance -- and then airlift, oh my Lord, Ted, how blessed she was to have you!

You and the doctors did all you could, and in the end, keeping her comfortable was the best you could do. So glad Jack and Ben got to say their final goodbyes to their sleeping comfortable mom. So important!

We are sad and stunned from afar, but you Ted lived through it, obviously shocked and terrified yet her gallant hero and strong under fire dad to your boys. You have set a standard for them to live with forever; it's a gift you've given them. You and Denise have obviously done an outstanding job in raising extraordinary young men.

I so wish none of this had happened and I offer all I can, my unconditional love and caring for you, the boys and your whole family... Plus my admiration for the person Denise was in this life and for who you very obviously are, Ted. God bless you and help you get through this.

I'll hold off on calling you for a bit, let you gather yourself together and properly grieve your profound loss. But please know that I will be thinking of you (having seen your picture every day for years with Denise on the HER2 site). And again, I am thanking you with gratitude I can't adequately express for extending yourself midst this horrific ordeal, because you seem to understand our need as Sisters who loved Denise more than words can say.

Return to us whenever you are ready, Ted, and as often as you'd like, any hour of any day. We're here for you. I glorify all caregivers, as I know with my husband, I swear I worried more about him than I did myself (seeing expressions on his face, the face I know so very well, that I had never ever seen before). He was so scared. I understood how helpless he (and all caregivers) feel, wanting to do anything and everything and yet unable to make it all go away for us.

I know you'll stay strong. It's obviously your nature. And I know you know that your boys need you now more than ever. May their love for you, and Denise, and your love for them all keep you close and help you navigate through this storm of your lives. A true thunderstorm as we can only imagine.

With love, which is the most beautiful emotion in all the world,

Andi