[BonnieR]

Tina, one thing that struck me about your post was your feeling "how did I let this happen to me?" If I read it correctly. I identified with you because after I had part of my lung removed after a misdiagnosis of Cancer, I spent an inordinate amount if time berating myself for letting this get by me. For not handling it differently (although I don't know how I coukd have prevented a pathologist's error!). I felt it had gotten out of my control. I cried a lot. In retrospect I realize my reaction was largely driven by the narcotics I was on and by my sense of vulnerability We try so hard during this cancer experience to do the right thing and make fact based decisions. Then everything goes sideways!
I don't know how to help you make your next decisions. I can say that I opted to not have any reconstruction and have never regretted that decision. I am older than you and that may have been a factor. I just knew I didn't want anymore surgery or procedures I'm very comfortable I don't even use heavy prosthesis anymore but prefer slightly padded bras like Coobie
I wish you the best in figuring out your path. Stay open to "signs" from others. Keep the faithBonnie