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Rachel_BC · 04-28-2014, 06:37 AM

Hello-
I was DX'd January 2009, my son was 11 months old, I am a single mom.
I am ER/PR+ Stage I HER2 -, Oncotyped out of Chemo, just lumpectomy, rads and tamoxifen.
I lived on the BC.org Forums, then formed my own group on an email list, you're all welcome to join, although we are pretty inactive on the list. We have at least one HER2+ member.
I am posting because my son just started at NEDenise's school today. I wanted you to know a few things.

There's a big event coming up, this great public school raises funds not only for itself, but also they have built and maintain a school in Ethiopia, so I was reading up on it. That's when I first saw her name:
"This year the funds raised will continue to support [our school] Ethiopia, fund our H&SA programs, and donate to the Kasander Education Fund, in memory of our beloved 4th grade teacher, Denise Kasander."

I wanted to know who was Denise Kasander?

And that's how I ended up here, reading every word of every post about her, and many of her posts for hours last night. I'm having a hard time putting into words what I want to say, but I think you all know, you said it so well. I did not "know" her, but I also lost her, my son lost her, because we wont get to know her at school. She gave us so much by what she wrote here. It often seems like being an outstandingly wonderful person we need in this world puts a target on that person.

I looked up Kasander Education Fund to see what it's about (haven't got those details yet) and I found this, and really had to post it here to show you:
Elementary School installs Buddy Bench on playground in memory of late teacher

"The school installed a Buddy Bench on the playground in order for students to use if they feel lonely or excluded, in order to signal to other students to talk to them or invite them to play…
'She was one of those people who was always an advocate for the underdog,” [another teacher] said of Kasander. “If there was ever any kind of social injustice, she was the one to jump in and fix it when it came to kids getting along or a bullying situation.'…
The buddy bench was the first of a number of ideas that will be put into place throughout the year to honor Kasander’s memory."

I read so many here who said she was the first to reach out to them, and along with her character, she was also the one to jump in for the students, any kind of social injustice… and against the injustice of "cucking fancer" (we call it "SFBC", I got that "cucking fancer" from someone here).

What an incredible person. Her amazing grace and humor here, her beyond valiant fight against the worst imaginable, how she helped children and influenced others in her "real" life, will evidently continue in perpetuity. She's gone, but she's still helping my little boy, starting school so late in the year, if he ever feels lonely or left out, he can go to the bench in her name, and find a friend.

I look forward to every continuing event in her name.

Sending you all love and positive thoughts, including you in my prayers, and thanks.

04-28-2014, 06:37 AM	#172
Rachel_BC Junior Member Join Date: Apr 2014 Posts: 1	Re: NEDenise Legacy Hello- I was DX'd January 2009, my son was 11 months old, I am a single mom. I am ER/PR+ Stage I HER2 -, Oncotyped out of Chemo, just lumpectomy, rads and tamoxifen. I lived on the BC.org Forums, then formed my own group on an email list, you're all welcome to join, although we are pretty inactive on the list. We have at least one HER2+ member. I am posting because my son just started at NEDenise's school today. I wanted you to know a few things. There's a big event coming up, this great public school raises funds not only for itself, but also they have built and maintain a school in Ethiopia, so I was reading up on it. That's when I first saw her name: "This year the funds raised will continue to support [our school] Ethiopia, fund our H&SA programs, and donate to the Kasander Education Fund, in memory of our beloved 4th grade teacher, Denise Kasander." I wanted to know who was Denise Kasander? And that's how I ended up here, reading every word of every post about her, and many of her posts for hours last night. I'm having a hard time putting into words what I want to say, but I think you all know, you said it so well. I did not "know" her, but I also lost her, my son lost her, because we wont get to know her at school. She gave us so much by what she wrote here. It often seems like being an outstandingly wonderful person we need in this world puts a target on that person. I looked up Kasander Education Fund to see what it's about (haven't got those details yet) and I found this, and really had to post it here to show you: Elementary School installs Buddy Bench on playground in memory of late teacher "The school installed a Buddy Bench on the playground in order for students to use if they feel lonely or excluded, in order to signal to other students to talk to them or invite them to play… 'She was one of those people who was always an advocate for the underdog,” [another teacher] said of Kasander. “If there was ever any kind of social injustice, she was the one to jump in and fix it when it came to kids getting along or a bullying situation.'… The buddy bench was the first of a number of ideas that will be put into place throughout the year to honor Kasander’s memory." I read so many here who said she was the first to reach out to them, and along with her character, she was also the one to jump in for the students, any kind of social injustice… and against the injustice of "cucking fancer" (we call it "SFBC", I got that "cucking fancer" from someone here). What an incredible person. Her amazing grace and humor here, her beyond valiant fight against the worst imaginable, how she helped children and influenced others in her "real" life, will evidently continue in perpetuity. She's gone, but she's still helping my little boy, starting school so late in the year, if he ever feels lonely or left out, he can go to the bench in her name, and find a friend. I look forward to every continuing event in her name. Sending you all love and positive thoughts, including you in my prayers, and thanks.