[NEDenise]

You guys are the best medicine in the world!
(Well, the best one that doesn't directly kick HER2 BC's a$$!)

I am so happy to be home! Sleeping in my own bed. Eating what I want, when I want. Cuddling my children, my husband and my dogs as much as they'll tolerate.

And, it's much, much better to be able to decide if I need pain medicine, and then to be able to decide which ones and how much. I hated having to take what the all-powerful pharmacy computer said I needed, or else have to wait for the next time it was due (sometimes several hours later). Plus, and this will shock you, I'm sure, I'm a bit of a control freak. I know, you'd never have guessed...but I like to be in charge of my own stuff.

So...the pain is still there. Not anywhere near what I was feeling before surgery...not even in the same league. You know how they ask you to assign a number to your pain? Before surgery, and I'm not exaggerating here, before surgery, the lowest number we were able to get to was 6 - and then only briefly. Most of that week was spent hovering in the crazy place between 8 and 9 - it makes me cringe just to think about it. So, let's not!

After the surgeon worked his magic (and some clever person reattached the pain med IV) I only hit 7 once.
And since then I haven't been above 4...
I can report happily to you that right now I am smiling, resting comfortably while I check in with all of you, and am at pain level 2...
mostly because of all the staples that are keeping everything closed up nice and tight.

The highlight of my evening (get the big L for my forehead ready) is going to be a shower...in my own bathroom, using my own soap, shampoo, and conditioner. mmmm

Then, using my own gel, and smoothing mousse, hairdryer, and curling iron...I will, for the first time in 2 weeks have a hair-do that looks like me. Heck! If I still have enough stamina left, I may even put on a little eyeliner and lipstick. aaahhhh

Then, just because I can,
I will use my own favorite lotions and perfumes,
dress myself in a nightgown that has never, ever, been worn by another living soul...
and which is not brutally, painfully ugly,
and sit curled on my couch to watch something so funny that all the laughing makes my stitches ache.

Naturally, with my current level of energy...this evening will be for me...what swimming kilometers in the ocean is to our beautiful Amanda! I may only be able to accomplish part of my goal...but tomorrow is another day!

Love and hugs to all!
Denise