HER2 Support Group Forums - View Single Post - Started anti-depressant feeling funky

JessicaV · 03-31-2015, 04:07 PM

A change in your support system is upsetting. Hope you can find a good counsellor, and also that you get the support you need.
Do you know about the Bad Day Box system? To set it up, your "wise-mother" self goes collecting or shopping with and for your "hurting child" self. They need to be items that will not damage your quality of life by adding alcohol, drugs or too much sugar or too much fat, or break the budget. The aim is to get a collection of items that brighten things for you when you are having a really bad day. On a bad day, and only on a bad day, you can open the box and take out one item of your choice that will help. It not only brightens your day but reminds you that whatever happens, even when you can't find any part of you able to comfort and console the hurting child within, that wise-mothering part has left these symbols of herself for you.
I put into my bad day box a couple of unread books by my favourite murder mystery writers, a couple of special scented teas, a bottle of bubble-bath, and a couple of books of affirmations that hit the spot for me. Plus a list of the people I really can email or call for a chat at any time (even though when I am feeling bad I may tell myself nobody would want to hear me whinge.) Plus some swiss chocolates which I eat one of when I think chocolate will help.
It may seem like mind games but I find it works for me.

03-31-2015, 04:07 PM	#8
JessicaV Senior Member Join Date: Apr 2014 Posts: 206	Re: Started anti-depressant feeling funky A change in your support system is upsetting. Hope you can find a good counsellor, and also that you get the support you need. Do you know about the Bad Day Box system? To set it up, your "wise-mother" self goes collecting or shopping with and for your "hurting child" self. They need to be items that will not damage your quality of life by adding alcohol, drugs or too much sugar or too much fat, or break the budget. The aim is to get a collection of items that brighten things for you when you are having a really bad day. On a bad day, and only on a bad day, you can open the box and take out one item of your choice that will help. It not only brightens your day but reminds you that whatever happens, even when you can't find any part of you able to comfort and console the hurting child within, that wise-mothering part has left these symbols of herself for you. I put into my bad day box a couple of unread books by my favourite murder mystery writers, a couple of special scented teas, a bottle of bubble-bath, and a couple of books of affirmations that hit the spot for me. Plus a list of the people I really can email or call for a chat at any time (even though when I am feeling bad I may tell myself nobody would want to hear me whinge.) Plus some swiss chocolates which I eat one of when I think chocolate will help. It may seem like mind games but I find it works for me. __________________ 1997-2004 many cysts, many MG & U/S: polycystic breasts. Sept 2013 found lump,Cyst?? forgot lump. Dec 2013 GP check, Referred for U/S, MG,FNA. 7 Jan 2014 Radiology: Radiologist turned screen away from me. When asked she said "Not a cyst, very suspicious.See your GP asa results avail." Cancelled my psych clients for the week. 8 Jan 14 GP: 2.2cm IDC in 6cm DCIS field. FNA=malignant cells. Referred to Surgeon. Cancelled my psych clients for the month. 13 Jan 14 Surgeon said L mastectomy not lumpectomy, offered neoadjunctive trial, agreed adjunctive chemo after surgery a good choice for me. Booked Body scan and bone scan for staging (both fine) Surgery for16 Jan, 16 Jan 14 Surgeon also agreed in preop meeting to also remove 6cm fatty cyst in job lot. Good job done. 19 Jan 14 discharged home with 1 drain. 22 Jan 14 drain partly pulled out overnight, serious seroma (600 ml reducing removed every 2 days for a month) Serious staph infection because nurse said wait 3 days for yr surgeon appointment. 26Jan 14 pathology: 2.2cm Grade 3(3,3,2)ER-, PgR-, HER2+2 so to be confirmed by Sish test. Node negative. No vascular or lymphatic involvement. No metastases in scans. 30 Jan 14 HER2+ high amplification, 13 gene copies per cell. 21st Feb 14 Began 3wkly TCH adjuvant treatment at The Mount Hospital Perth, with 3monthly MUGA heart tests +Oncologist or Surgeon full physical check-up. Cancelled my psych clients for 6 months. Feb 14 First MUGA test: 71%, First C15.3 test: 20 7th March 14 began Neulasta self-applied injections 24hrs after each TCH treatment. Bonepain helped by spa, heatpacks and Claritin, reflux/indigestion helped by Somac. July 14 completed docetaxol and carboplatin, ongoing herceptin to 12 months. Severe cognitive deficit/fatigue after 1pm daily. Sept 14 Second MUGA test: 69% Cancelled my psych clients for 2014 Dec 14 Third MUGA test: 70% Second C15.3 test : 20 Cognitive fatigue delays return to work. March 2015 Tachycardia pulse 168, night in hospital. Cardiologist says no heart disease, ALIVE ECG attachment for my mobile phone now regular monitoring. July 2015 Worktrial, up to 8hrs per wk. Fatigue ongoing Aug 2015 Heart good, no evidence of cancer, just Fatigue. May 2019 Melanoma 1.5cm Stage 1 by right collarbone(was present as large freckle in 2014 and cut through by breast surgeon to remove fatty cyst at same time as mastectomy.) Melanoma removed leaving scar from shoulder to breastbone. In hospital twice for IV antibiotics. Told catagorically this could not be BC mets. Dec 2019 Still NED, still fatigue in late afternoon, but have my brain back in the early mornings. So most days I watch the sunrise and hear the birds morning chorus in my bush backyard and am glad to be alive and to be me still.