[janetcaruso]

Hi Carla, Like you, I was Stage IV at diagnosis - 18/18 nodes involved with mets to liver and bones. I had 5 months of Taxotere + Herceptin and now Tamoxifen + Herceptin. I have just passed the 1 year mark since starting treatment & will be on Herceptin for life. (My onc just said that having metastatic disease qualifies me for lifelong treatment with Herceptin, but if I get tired of coming in every 3 weeks for the infusion we could talk about taking a break for a while...I think it's doing what it's supposed to so would rather continue, but may have to go off it anyway as my last MUGA & following echocardiogram showed an abnormality in the heart wall so am soon to see a cardiologist for further assessment.) What keeps me going? Well, my 3 children aged 16, 14 & 12 for sure. I still have to get them to dance classes, guitar lessons and soccer games (which I love to watch) and I try to stay very involved in their lives. (Too much so my 16-yr-old son would say! But teenagers do seem to require more work than toddlers did!!!) Like you, I feel my children need me & with 3 kids there is always so much that needs to be done!! I have to keep going!! I also have an incredibly supportive group of friends & co-workers. I found I really thrive on the energy of those around me. Last summer especially I was constantly surrounding myself with (or being surrounded by) those who had a positive energy. My cousin & her daughter came & stayed with me from New Zealand for a bit, my brother & his son were here visiting for a while too, my neighbours arranged a fantastic 50th birthday party for me. And although certainly tired at times, for the most part I was feeling well enough to do a fair bit. I really didn't even mind losing my hair - being such a hot summer it was much cooler that way!! (Made it easier though that I don't have to work through the summer.) And I was learning about & trying some alternate therapies (chinese medicines, garlic concoctions, essiac, milk thisle etc) which did give me a sense of empowerment. So, keep your spirits up, stay positive, new inroads are being made all the time -- we can beat this thing!!
Janet