[Sukey]

I am to begin treatment tomorrow w Herceptin alone after just completing 28 treatments of radiation to the supraclavicular/brachial plexus area...recurrence after almost 7 years NED. Received CMF and radiation back then and went on w life. Scans have shown no other activity at this point so Oncs felt Rads first 'cuz nerve involvement has left me w little use of my R arm and hand. Now Herceptin every 3 weeks; after 3 treatments, more scans to see what if anything is going on. Am I scared...you bet I am!!
I am 64 and had hoped to live on into my 90s like most members of my senior family.
I am active at the gym, kayak, whitewater raft guide, work full time and am primary caregiver for my Mom who has Alzheimer's. ( Mom is a 60-year survivor of Ovarian cancer!!! ) If all goes without incident...Herceptin alone will continue. If not, something else will be added...Onc wants to save "big guns" for later, if needed. It is now hitting me that I have something BIG going on and find myself being teary and edgy...not like me at all!! Also dealing w compression bandaging again for lymphedema that has added to the nerve damage...so back to lymphedema therapy. Gratefully, I work in my PCP's office and have a great support system there...some of the staff has gone thru this w me before. I guess I just need this place and you folks to vent abit.
I am feeling somewhat guilty about having to take time out of a busy work place to take care of my "stuff"...I know I must take care of this...just all seems so overwhelming now..................