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Jeff, I'm sorry but I don't remember where you are, US or Canada (I think U.S.?) Anyway, I ran into a similar problem. I started out with a pretty dopey surgeon in my small home town, and when I finally wised up and got my pcp to refer me to doctors in Seattle, the very busy oncologist I saw happened to copy a letter that he wrote to my pcp to the original surgeon -- probably from seeing her name on the original biopsy report in my file. It really IS intended as a simple courtesy so that patient care is better coordinated, but at the time it really upset me. I wanted no more to do with her and all I knew at that point was that if things turned serious I might indeed have to resort to some kind of confrontational battles later on.
You are right; if you are not intending to change providers, take a written request with you when you go to the second opinion provider, stating that you do not wish copies of your visit to be sent to any other providers unless you actually begin treatment with the doctor providing the second opinion. You can always throw it away if you decide at that office visit to continue with that provider.
In my case it would have been a good idea for me to provide a written request to my new surgeon and my oncologist when I met them, naming the doctor who should not receive copies of anything, just as added protection. As it was, I ended up handwriting a letter on the plane down, which was where I discovered the notation indicating a copy had been sent to the original surgeon. I described precisely why I did not want her to receive a copy, although that really was not necessary.
A.A.
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