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Re: Is there any Holiday Hope?
StephN, How do I forgive myself and do what you said?? I want to do that I just don't know how or where to begin!! I want to cut them out of my head and never see or think of them again, and I know it is bad but I think bad thoughts in my head of what I would like see happen. I don't know how she can even stand living in the house that I helped build over the past 18 years, and I left the house to my ex (didn't make him buy me out). I did it because he is the one that wanted out and it was too much for me to take care of an finally so my son would always have the home we raised him in, and I NEVER, NEVER thought about another woman living in it....I know how dumb am I...
I prayed for God to take it from me, and I thought he did. Then this wedding this past Friday just had me shook...And it came back like it never left. My son said he is buying him a new Challenger on Christmas break and what 21 year old kid won't love that. And again at his age these things mean alot!! I just feel like I am nothing to the one who is the love of my life my son.
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myleftlump.wordpress.com - started blogging my
IDC breast cancer
7/2012 diagnosed with multiple solid lesions
7/20/12 biopsy done. ER+ 30 PR -, HER+++,k167 80% Grade 2
9/2012 biopsy on lymph node - showed malignant
9/2012 Pre-adjunctive TCH chemo.
12/6/12 MRI after Pre-adj.
Results: Modest Decrease in size of left breast malignancy As well as the associated satellite lesions and auxiliary Adenopathy compared to prior study. Doctors hoped for better but good response it didn't grow.
12/18/2012 left masectomy with axillary nodes
Size 3.2 CM, Nottingham score 9/9
Grade 3, no evidence of in situ carcinoma
Areas of angiolymphatic are identified
Carcinoma is 0.5 cm from inked deep
Margin of excision
Attached axillary lymph nodes: metastatic
Carcinoma in 6 of 8 nodes.
Size of largest node 1.5 cm
Extracapsular
ER + 73%, PR+2%, HER2+
2/27/13 6 weeks of IMRT radiation finished
2/2013 Started on Tamoxifan 5 years.
8/2013 will take last Herceptin, 17 treatments total every 3 weeks.
BRCA1 & BRAC2 - Negative
August 28, 2013 DIEP flap on the left breast.
February 2014 Nip & Tuck
March 14, 2014 nipple reconstruction and removed port.
August 14, 2014 lump in lymph nodes under arm and above clavicle. Stage IV
August 28, 2014 herceptin And projeta starting and port put back in.
3/18/15 stopped arimidex.
3/18/15 progression....Tdm1
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