[Joan M]

Carolyn,

I've also opted for unconventional treatments. There's a standard of care, and to some oncologists it's blasphemy to step outside the guidelines.

For example, last week I checked in with the onc at the major NYC cancer center who I've been consulting for about four years, and he wasn't "warm and fuzzy" because I've never taken his advice.

He kept saying that when my cancer recurred the first time I belonged on systemic therapy (which he has said before), but that instead I kept doing "radical treatments" like the lung wedge resection and then the RFA (also, he's done three things under the table to try to interfere with my treatments, which I learned about from other docs).

He also reminded me that he has 20 years of experience, and then he asked me why I even bother making appointments to see him. He also said I was "undermining" my local oncologist by consulting him (even though she knew I was there and they had spoken on the phone just minutes prior to my appointment). He said that he was trying to give me confidence in my local onc, that they were on the same page. (Ironically, although she's not a bc specialist, she also has a doctorate in molecular biology of bc, and a paper she wrote was chosen by a major cancer group for presentation at its annual meeting several years ago. The problem is that I'm not crazy about my local hospital, except I like the cancer institute and my onc).

He said, yet again, that I continue to pick weeds and that it doesn't solve the problem because the problem is systemtic. When I told him that my "weed picking" has to do with my quality of life, he completely ignored that. It's as if my quality of life and ability to work (until recently because I've "retired" now) was besides the point.

I consider myself "fortunate" (if advanced cancer can be considered that way), that I have been able to avoid chemo for almost three years since the nodule in my left lung first showed up in a CT scan in late Dec. 2006, just over 3 years after my mastectomy and stage IIb cancer diagnosis in Sept. 2003. That means that except for the inconvenience of surgery and the RFA procedure, I've felt good every day. Even this last surgery, the thoracotomy, which was a bull, was worth it.

He didn't seem to comprehend or grasp the quality issue. And until future scans show otherwise I'm NED again.

I felt like a "little" cancer patient being bullied by the big guy on the block because I hadn't taken any of his advice. It's very difficult to navigate.

Joan