HER2 Support Group Forums - View Single Post - ~In-Patient Hospice For Mighty Oak~Letting Go....

Believe51 · 10-01-2009, 11:22 PM

The brain mets and the Decadron has left me no choice but to put him in Hospice. He has tried to flee and escaped the house. This is a man that cannot feel his feet and has trouble getting out of chair, bed, couch. I promised him to die at home with dignity and grace, I can only provide him the dignity and grace. He is paranoid from the drugs and mets and no longer trusts me. He refused pain meds, refused to change for me....etc.

My heart is heavy as I sit here in complete silence. My oak is away and will not be returning. I find myself walking light and being quiet and there is no one here I need to do that for.

I will start with work soon and shall continue to fight this beast in the honor of our lost Warriors, for the Warriors I love and for all those to come. Make room for me cancer, I am here and ready to continue to kick your ass over and over again!!

I have not yet begun to fight!!>>Love Marie

PS: My job description will include all PUBLIC SPEAKING AND PLEADING for the foundation and I am just the tiger to do it..........This is for you Mighty Oak and for all of us that live this horror!!

10-01-2009, 11:22 PM	#1
Believe51 Senior Member Join Date: Jun 2007 Location: RHODE ISLAND (Ed getting me a latte on 2nd Cancerversary Cruise 2008) 'BELIEVE': To accept as true or real, To have faith in, To presume ALWAYS BELIEVE Posts: 2,999	~In-Patient Hospice For Mighty Oak~Letting Go.... The brain mets and the Decadron has left me no choice but to put him in Hospice. He has tried to flee and escaped the house. This is a man that cannot feel his feet and has trouble getting out of chair, bed, couch. I promised him to die at home with dignity and grace, I can only provide him the dignity and grace. He is paranoid from the drugs and mets and no longer trusts me. He refused pain meds, refused to change for me....etc. My heart is heavy as I sit here in complete silence. My oak is away and will not be returning. I find myself walking light and being quiet and there is no one here I need to do that for. I will start with work soon and shall continue to fight this beast in the honor of our lost Warriors, for the Warriors I love and for all those to come. Make room for me cancer, I am here and ready to continue to kick your ass over and over again!! I have not yet begun to fight!!>>Love Marie PS: My job description will include all PUBLIC SPEAKING AND PLEADING for the foundation and I am just the tiger to do it..........This is for you Mighty Oak and for all of us that live this horror!! __________________ 9/7/06Husband 50yrs=StageIV IBC/HER2+,BoneMets10/06TaxotereX10,'H'1X wk,Zometa,Tamoxifen4/12/07Last Tax5/18/07Pet=Rapid Cell Activity,No Organ Mets,Lytic Lesions,Degeneration,Some Bone Repair5/07ChemoFail6/01/07Pleural Thoracentisis=Effusions,NoMalignantCells6/19/07+7/2/07DFCI 6/25/07BrainMRI=BrainMets,Many<9mm7/10/07WBR/PelvisRad37.5Gx15&Nutritionist8/19/07T/X9/20/07BrainMRI=2<2mm10/6/07Pet=BoneProgression 10/24/07ChemoFail11/9/07A/Cx10,EndTam12/7/07Faslodex12/10/07Muga7512/13/07BlasticLesions1/7/08BrainMRI=Clear4/1/08Pet=BoneImprovement, NoProgression,Stable4/7/08BrainPerfect5/16/08Last A/C8/26/08BrainMets=10(<9mm)9/10/08Gamma10/30/08Met=5mm12/19/08Gamma5mets5 12/22/08SpinalMets1/14/09SpinalRads2/17/09BrainMRI=NoNewMets4/20/09BoneScan5/14/09Ixempra6/1/09BrainMRI=NumerousMets6/24/09DFCIw/DrBurstein6/26/09Continue Ixempra/Faslodex/Zometa~TM now lower7/17/09Stop Ixempra By Choice9/21/09HOSPICE10/16/09Earned His Deserved Wings And Halo=37 Month Fight w/Stage 4 IBC, Her2+++,My Hero!!