[Jackie07]

Sassy,

In our 'Chinese family' in Taiwan, there's not a clear cut of separation when children reach adulthood. All young men participate in some form of military training for 1-2 years when they reach 20 years of age. And most of them came back a 'man' - attending college (if they haven't been graduated - college students delay their training until after receiving their diploma), getting a job, raising a family. Both young men (and young women) usually continue to live in their parents' house until they are married or out of town working/ going to college - because housing is extremely expensive there.

I went to college in the Capital city and stayed in my Oldest Brother's apartment at the very beginning before I moved to the dorm on campus. It's only 30-50 minutes bus ride from home, so I was home quite frequently during holidays or any long period of breaks.

My parents had tears in their eyes when seeing me off at the airport in 1984 - I was headed for Texas for my graduate study. I never thought I would be staying here, but they seemed to have known it. So far I've only been home three times (spending 2 weeks with them each time) and 2 of my 5 siblings (Oldest Brother and 2nd Sister) had been here a total of three times, including taking care of me after my brain surgery in 1990 and double mastectomy in 2007.

I would like to go home visit more often, but my 'empty head' does not take the cabin pressure well - suffered very much the three times I flew home and back. It's been understood that I might not be able to go 'home' to visit them ever in my life time.

One of my two Sisters calls me every weekend. I call my parents at least once a month just to let them know that I am OK. - I did not do that until after my recurrence... Remember 'no news is good news' - you might want to give your son a phone card and tell him to call home regularly...

Even though I don't have children of my own, I wanted to share with y'all my point of view from the other side...