[Andrea Barnett Budin]

I think we all want to move forward as a general way of approaching each day. We each seek to open the gates that are closed to us. And it is a mystery as to how we do that. We actively strive to grow and become more, with each day. So darn many Lessons to learn! So much pain involved. Ugh... How do we find ways to conquer our fears and doubts? Is it possible to gain a degree of control over our lives? Or are we helpless mere mortals?

I do know that no amount of positive thinking will be enough if we don't unlock those gates. And that is not easy, to be sure. I read that the world was created with empty spaces (for our creations to fill). So with that in mind, I work at mindfully creating each moment. One step at a time. Always grounded in the present moment, yet working with goals that are clear in my head. Clear in my stated Intentions and Expectations, clear in the images I create and linger on. All this produces a kind of energy that goes out from me. It is met by others, and by the Universe itself. It is responded to IN KIND. At least w/the Universe. The Universe definitely gets it!

Anger, depression, remorse, uncertainty -- they all hold us back from expanding and creating. The payoff for acknowledging, experiencing and then chasing away those debilitating emotions (a monumental undertaking, granted) is that our success impacts the quality of our lives, both physically and psychologically.

Our bodies take their cues from our thoughts. And the thoughts that circulate in our heads all day will be reflected in how we feel emotionally. So the payoff for us to work on conquering those negative feelings is huge. And of course the goal is to accomplish this without doing harm to others. Our bodies and the Universe sense negativity and respond IN KIND. I believe this on the deepest of levels.

I may seem as if I am ever joyful and peaceful, and to a great extent that is true. It comes with serious conscious, concentrated effort however. And I, like most of us, have my moments. I am human after all. We each feel at times overcome with fear, w/all the what ifs that come w/canser. We feel at times that it is all too daunting. We feel weak, we think we can't do this, that the task at hand is beyond our ability. It's too much. We given our all and we deserve better. We even get mad at ourselves for not succeeding. We are frustrated, have feelings of injustice and being the unfortunate target of that. Some act out.

But it is when we succumb to a victim's mentality (which we're each prone to resort to) that serves as the *foundation* of our negativity. See the connection?

I try to remember that every second I invest in self-pity and woundedness is time I'm not spending moving forward. I replace those lost feelings with the remembrance that I am the creator of my emotions. I refuse to give that power away to the voice in my head (which Eckhart Tolle says is our ego talking). I choose instead to connect with the guidance of my Inner Voice, which is my Spirit, and my Truest Self. It has powers that are sacred and have the might to carry me to joy and serenity, no matter what else is occurring. Once I connect with my Spirit -- EVERYTHING CHANGES! It is miraculous. I change as does my emotional state. And perhaps, I believe it helps to alter circumstances.

Wayne Dyer speaks of living AS IF. As if what you desire is already on its way to you. In the air waves. Making its way to your doorstep. I trust that this is so. So, I am free to therefore live w/happiness and serenity.

Just after being dx w/4th stage bc, after my mastectomy and while on chemo and before ever reading Wayne, my friends would look at me w/a puzzled look. What's going?, they'd tilt their heads and stare? What is that I see?, they'd ask. You look -- they searchd for the word -- radiant. Peaceful. You see, I was living AS IF. I just KNEW that I would survive, despite all the poor prognoses. My Inner Voice had told me this rather dramatically from the getgo. It was a first for me. I couldn't even explain what had occurred. But I had been given full assurance that I would live! And I KNEW it was more than a wish. More like a declaration. Like my Spirit had seen this movie before and knew the ending... Creepy but exactly what I experienced.

Dr. Wayne Dyer's books have been a source of great wisdom for me. I found him (recommended by a friend) between my orig dx and my recurrance. I have gained strength and courage and become emboldened by his words and ideas. I have taken them and incorporated them in my Soul (along w/Eckhart Tolle's perspective of Life as explained in A NEW EARTH and in THE POWER OF NOW). Gary Zucav's SEAT OF THE SOUL has also been life-altering for me. Their words resonated as Truth in a most profound way. And they helped change my life!

I watch Wayne on PBS whenever he appears. I had a front row seat at a Boca lecture he gave yrs ago (when he was living in Boca, where his children attend school). He's like my Elvi. When I hear him, read him, I feel as if Elvis is in the house.

Wayne's books are packed with a wealth of electrifying and empowering ways of viewing Life and our ability to control so much more than we ever imagined.

I loved his YOUR SACRED SELF, YOU'LL BELIEVE IT WHEN YOU SEE IT, WISDOM OF THE AGES, THE POWER OF INTENTION, THERE'S A SPIRITUAL SOLUTION TO EVERY PROBLEM, MANIFEST YOUR DESTINY (THE NINE PRINCIPLES OF GETTING EVERYTHING YOU WANT), SECRETS OF YOUR OWN HEALING POWER. No, I'm not selling these bks. Just recommending them to those who are interested in open their gates.

I urge any of you who are interested in such topics, to read away. I use a highlighter at all times. It's like a course in Life as I see it. Worthy of taking notes or at least underlining... It's not easy being human. Life is a classroom, full of mazes, challenges and obstacles.

Still, 4th stage bc/HER2+, the surgeries, the sacrificing of a breast, being totally bald for too many years including eyebrows and eyelashes, the chemos and the horrific side effects including the roller coaster of emotions that all brings -- I feel blessed. Grateful for each day. For sight and sound and breath...

My admiration of you, my Sisters, is gynormous. Too many of you have been through so much and yet you are so full of grace and generosity of Spirit, in sharing your experiences and your feelings, I stand in awe! Wishing NED to accompany each of you for eons to come...