[chrisy]

Hi Erica,
Well, you certainly tossed a wide range of questions out there! Good for you to get them in writing, most people have it all spinning around in their heads and never can get it out!

First, your friend is very very fortunate to have you. You so obviously care deeply for her. Being there for her, and letting her know you care are the best things you can do. As far as hitting the "right note", you sort of have to take your cue from her. And it is a delicate balancing act for sure. But it's totally natural to bounce around between all those emotions like a pinball.

The first progression is hard, because you do lose the dream that maybe, just maybe it won't ever come back. It was hard for me to give up that dream, but I do find much hope that better answers are just around the corner.

You sound like you already have a great awareness of the kinds of work that's being done out there - the past week with all the reports out of ASCO has been really energizing. So you know that there are lots of (too many??) options out there that could work very well, and for a long time. The "good news" if you can call it that, is being ER+ and Her2+ means she's got a target rich environment, with lots of weapons to bring to bear.

I think I'll post separately on some of your other questions, but since I always lead with my heart, I just want you to know that whatever she feels, and whatever you feel, is OK.