[Believe51]

Jackie, funny that you post these feelings because I remember the way I felt when you wrote about your Sweet Mother-in-Law. I cried when she passed because of the way we both felt about these special women. I am not sure how to get over this except give it time. Right now I am packing her life into boxes so it is hard to move forward.

I wanted to share something very special with you. The time she went into the hospital before the accident for something not related to it, she took her religious medals. This woman slept with them on the side of her, she prayed with them, she valued them the most of all her belongings. She swore that they threw them away or misplaced them there at the hospital. When Mom got home, her and a close friend of the family that I call my sister, moved furniture looking for it. They never found them and it only made Mom more sad. I felt sad also because they were so valued by her and I shared her loss.

Today Mighty Oak went to treatment finally, huuuuhh, easy for me to say! We went home and I got him comfortable and asked what he needed before I left. I had to go pack her home up and I needed to do this alone, I wanted to be alone. As I moved into the living room closet I knew I would keep myself busy. Something made me go over to her end table and clean out the assorted meds. I cleaned out these tables so it would make my mind think I was making some kind of headway.

I cried as I cleaned and asked her to forgive me but I needed to mourn. It is tough to get past these emotions when you lose an Angel. God certainly has work for her and I understand. I talked to her about many things as crazy as that sounds, but it felt natural at the time. Jackie, I found her medals on the chain they have always been on and believe me, these ladies looked hard for them. I would like to think that she made me find them and know that she is still watching over us.

Ed had a dream that she told him not to worry about a thing. I asked him if she was speaking of her death and its peace or his treatment and cancer. He said everything, do not worry about anything. I would try I told him.......but now I will try even harder. She is busy in heaven getting things ready for her son when it is his time.

For now we will fight and we shall believe. Thanks for listening. I feel such a special bond with you and even more so since hearing your glorious emotions shared in the past about her. I feel so much better now.>>Believe51