[Pam P]

I still don't know much more, but now at least have a plan. I am having a nuecular stress test on Tues. To give more info on why part of my heart is not pumping. It is mostly to see if there's a blockage in artery I think. If a blockage is found, an angiogram will be next. They also did an ekg showing some abnormalities which could indicate blockage.

I'm also to have another echo gram in 2 weeks. And I'm to start a beta blocker medication. I will stay off the avastin but continue with the taxol treatments.

The cardiologist said she wasn't as concerned about the fluid around the heart - it's a small amount but will be watched. Also didn't say about the drop in LVEF; asked about hercptin, etc.

So I don't have answers but at least the stress test is soon & hopefully that will be better news. I am dreading it all & praying that I don't need anything more than some meds - & not angiogram or worse.

I'm trying to get calm, trying deep breathing. I hope I'm not being a big whiner -- everyone here is so brave & strong. I don't know how you hold together -although I know you have the same panic times that I do. This is so unfair for us to have to deal with so much. I know that's an obvious statement - and also a dumb statement - life isn't fair & we don't get to choose; I just had to say it.