HER2 Support Group Forums - View Single Post

Becky · 06-13-2008, 06:55 PM

I was diagnosed in August 2004 and joined the board in October.

I was petrified that I was Her2+ and like your mom, Herceptin was not available for adjuvant treatment unless you were Stage 4. What was amazing to me was your mother and others, who did progress to Stage 4, not only gave me hope that I wouldn't recur but also showed me that if I did, it wasn't an immediate death sentence and I could have many, many years with my children, 2 of whom were still in elementary or high school. I was diagnosed just before my oldest daughter went to college. It is unfortunate that your mother became too ill to know that just a few weeks ago, she graduated college. And I will also see my other children graduate too because your mother was one of many that encouraged me to fight for adjuvant Herceptin before it was standard and I was not into advocacy as much as I am now because of women like her. I was encouraged to dump a doctor (onc) who was just not right for me (and IMHO - right for anyone at all). When I got a new lump she was the first to respond and tell me to not count my chickens before they hatched and she was right - it was only a cyst!

I am heartbroken about your mother's death. I did not realize she was so ill and I feel terrible about it. She was a fighter and did go through so many differing treatments. However, I am sure ALL my Her2 sisters will agree with me - Lolly NEVER,NEVER, NEVER once complained. Never! Never a woe is me. She carefully would explain what symptoms or difficulties she encountered only so we would all know what to expect if we needed that drug or treatment. She TAUGHT us - not only about treatment but about how to be a true lady who was fiercely devoted to those she loved - your father - who she spoke of with great respect and of you.

Of course we know her as our Lolly and we know her in a way you will never know her but surely you can guess. But you know her in the best way because except for one or two of us, you have hugged her and kissed her and talked to her all your life. Its the hugging that is the best and you got that. And we have her words which is a different kind of love and relationship that the ones who get the hugs don't get enough of because with words comes infinite wisdom that is handed down through the generations. So in a sense, we shared her in different ways - through hugs, kisses and words.

I am truly sorry for your loss. We have all lost a great woman.

06-13-2008, 06:55 PM	#8
Becky Senior Member Join Date: Sep 2005 Location: Stockton, NJ Posts: 4,179	I was diagnosed in August 2004 and joined the board in October. I was petrified that I was Her2+ and like your mom, Herceptin was not available for adjuvant treatment unless you were Stage 4. What was amazing to me was your mother and others, who did progress to Stage 4, not only gave me hope that I wouldn't recur but also showed me that if I did, it wasn't an immediate death sentence and I could have many, many years with my children, 2 of whom were still in elementary or high school. I was diagnosed just before my oldest daughter went to college. It is unfortunate that your mother became too ill to know that just a few weeks ago, she graduated college. And I will also see my other children graduate too because your mother was one of many that encouraged me to fight for adjuvant Herceptin before it was standard and I was not into advocacy as much as I am now because of women like her. I was encouraged to dump a doctor (onc) who was just not right for me (and IMHO - right for anyone at all). When I got a new lump she was the first to respond and tell me to not count my chickens before they hatched and she was right - it was only a cyst! I am heartbroken about your mother's death. I did not realize she was so ill and I feel terrible about it. She was a fighter and did go through so many differing treatments. However, I am sure ALL my Her2 sisters will agree with me - Lolly NEVER,NEVER, NEVER once complained. Never! Never a woe is me. She carefully would explain what symptoms or difficulties she encountered only so we would all know what to expect if we needed that drug or treatment. She TAUGHT us - not only about treatment but about how to be a true lady who was fiercely devoted to those she loved - your father - who she spoke of with great respect and of you. Of course we know her as our Lolly and we know her in a way you will never know her but surely you can guess. But you know her in the best way because except for one or two of us, you have hugged her and kissed her and talked to her all your life. Its the hugging that is the best and you got that. And we have her words which is a different kind of love and relationship that the ones who get the hugs don't get enough of because with words comes infinite wisdom that is handed down through the generations. So in a sense, we shared her in different ways - through hugs, kisses and words. I am truly sorry for your loss. We have all lost a great woman. __________________ Kind regards Becky Found lump via BSE Diagnosed 8/04 at age 45 1.9cm tumor, ER+PR-, Her2 3+(rt side) 2 micromets to sentinel node Stage 2A left 3mm DCIS - low grade ER+PR+Her2 neg lumpectomies 9/7/04 4DD AC followed by 4 DD taxol Used Leukine instead of Neulasta 35 rads on right side only 4/05 started Tamoxifen Started Herceptin 4 months after last Taxol due to trial results and 2005 ASCO meeting & recommendations Oophorectomy 8/05 Started Arimidex 9/05 Finished Herceptin (16 months) 9/06 Arimidex Only Prolia every 6 months for osteopenia NED 18 years! Said Christopher Robin to Pooh: "You must remember this: You're braver than you believe and stronger than you seem and smarter than you think"