[~Bellydancer~]

I have not contributed here much at aall as I am not as informed as many of you. I find myself at the end of positivity now. I had the surgery in Oct/07 Diep flap went well. I started FEC Dec 1/07 went according to their expectations??? Nausea and vomitting and fatigue but I endured. I Had my first of three Tx's of Taxotere and Herceptin. Herceptin will continue for 1 yr. I apparently now will have to have 25 RAD Tx's as well. Here is the thing, I am so sick with this taxotere. I can not keep anything down, I ve tried plain things, small amounts, cold hot you name it nothing stays. I have diarrehea which has irritated my southern region to the point that I now am applying baby "butt" cream after every encounter in the WC. I have this red scaly rash on my inner thighs, neck and left side. I am tired but can not sleep. Basically I am at my end. I know that I have to go thru this 2 more times and I don't think that I can. I have no strength left, emotionally or physically for that matter. Rationally speaking this is a small price to pay for the rest of your life but when is it enough? How do they know that it is the 3 tx of this poison that does it? Where did this number come from? I called the nurse for some help and I heard in her voice that she doesn't know, as she flips thru pages to give me "answers". How do they know that the FEC didn't do the trick? If the Taxotere is the one then why do it lastly? I have faith and keep getting up each day but how much canyou endure?
I am sorry to rant.............You all have your own journey's.
Thanks for listening,
<Michelle>