HER2 Support Group Forums - View Single Post

Andrea Barnett Budin · 09-23-2007, 04:31 PM

That is an excellent question. I look forward to responses. My Stage fourness and my ongoing Vit H didn't totally do it for me at first. I felt like every one was ignoring me and busily interacting w/those familiar to them. Must have been my frame of mind. Like Havah, I felt like an outsider. But -- now I have settled and feel at home. And you, my Pink One, feel like I've known you forever, regardless of your med history. You are a Sister, my dear. I embrace you and your sense of humor. We need that around here midst all our intermittent dark thoughts.

Come to think of it, at one point on this board I felt scared away. My attitude was so peachy and I did/do coach those newly dx who are sent to me. Friends of friends who want to help but don't know how cause they've never been there. So I definitely have always felt I needed to share my viewpoints and my experience to give someone a hand up. And I often got such positive responses, and would keep up my relationship w/these newfound Sisters and fell in love a few times (you know what I mean). Some of the most incredible people I know I have found through bc, whereas our paths would not have crossed otherwise. So sometimes I'd log on here, way back when, and I'd feel myself being sucked in to the sadness vs what I felt when having a one on one conversation, which reinforced my thinking and elevated me, knowing I was helping another Soul.

My friends who knew of my *counseling* would lovingly tell me that I shouldn't let it drag me down. I've done so well and need to keep my health a priority. I would always tell them, I'm good, I feel wonderful serving this purpose. It actually motivated me to write the book I've been working on for 100 yrs. But for a while there, this board intimidated me and made me feel shaky, unnoticed, unanswered.

Much love,
Andi

09-23-2007, 04:31 PM	#3
Andrea Barnett Budin Senior Member Join Date: Oct 2005 Location: LAND OF YES! w/home in Boca Raton, Florida Orig from L.I., N.Y. Ever hovering IN THE NOW... Posts: 1,904	A Subject Worth Discussing! That is an excellent question. I look forward to responses. My Stage fourness and my ongoing Vit H didn't totally do it for me at first. I felt like every one was ignoring me and busily interacting w/those familiar to them. Must have been my frame of mind. Like Havah, I felt like an outsider. But -- now I have settled and feel at home. And you, my Pink One, feel like I've known you forever, regardless of your med history. You are a Sister, my dear. I embrace you and your sense of humor. We need that around here midst all our intermittent dark thoughts. Come to think of it, at one point on this board I felt scared away. My attitude was so peachy and I did/do coach those newly dx who are sent to me. Friends of friends who want to help but don't know how cause they've never been there. So I definitely have always felt I needed to share my viewpoints and my experience to give someone a hand up. And I often got such positive responses, and would keep up my relationship w/these newfound Sisters and fell in love a few times (you know what I mean). Some of the most incredible people I know I have found through bc, whereas our paths would not have crossed otherwise. So sometimes I'd log on here, way back when, and I'd feel myself being sucked in to the sadness vs what I felt when having a one on one conversation, which reinforced my thinking and elevated me, knowing I was helping another Soul. My friends who knew of my counseling would lovingly tell me that I shouldn't let it drag me down. I've done so well and need to keep my health a priority. I would always tell them, I'm good, I feel wonderful serving this purpose. It actually motivated me to write the book I've been working on for 100 yrs. But for a while there, this board intimidated me and made me feel shaky, unnoticed, unanswered. Much love, Andi __________________ Andi BB '95 post-meno dx Invasive LOBULAR w/9cm tumor! YIKES + 2/21 nodes. Clear mammo 10 mnths earlier. Mastec/tram flap reconst/PORT/8 mnths chemo (4Adria/8CMF). Borderline ER/PR. Tamoxifen 2 yrs. Felt BLESSED. I could walk and talk, feed and bathe myself! I KNEW I would survive... '98 -- multiple mets to liver. HER2+ 80%. ER/PR- Raging, highly aggressive tumors spreading fast. New PORT. 9 mnths Taxotere Fought fire w/fire! Pronounced in cautious remission 5/99. Taxotere weekly for 6 wks, 2 wks off -- for 9 mnths. TALK ABOUT GRUELING! (I believe they've altered that protocol since those days -- sure hope so!!) + good old Vit H wkly for 1st 3 yrs, then triple dosage ev 3 wks for 7 yrs more... The "easy" chemo, right?! Not a walk in the park, but not a freight train coming at 'ya either... Added Herceptin Nov '98 (6 wks after FDA fast-tracked it for met bc). Stayed w/Vit H till July '08! Now I AM FREE! Humbly and eternally grateful for this life-saving drug! NED since '99 and planning on keeping it that way. To hell w/poor prognosis and nasty stats! STOPPED VIT H JULY '08...! REMAIN STABLE... Eternally grateful...Yes is a world & in this world of yes live (skillfully curled) all worlds ... (e e cummings) EVERY DAY I BEAT MY PREVIOUS RECORD FOR # OF CONSECUTIVE DAYS I'VE STAYED ALIVE. Smile KNOWING you too can be a miracle. Up to me and God now...