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hermiracles 11-08-2008 08:47 AM

'Dying Mum'
 
Well my friends ~ it's been bit of a round trip to fully get back here and share with you all ~ though I am never far away in heart & Spirit.

Various scans show 'multiple' mets to bones, lungs & brain. I have just recently completed 2 weeks of whole brain radiation in Brisbane and then ended up in Palliative care, here at home as things got pretty distressing here with all the build up - not of the treatment so much - but just coping with the western medical system! (long story....)

I went straight from PC to our forum that we had organised for the National Breast Cancer Awareness Day!! (Long Day!!) The topic was Aboriginal Women and Healing through the Breast Cancer Journey ~ our Guest Speaker was a lovely woman who is Her2 + and told a wonderful story of healing. It went real good!

Then the local newpaper interviewed some of us - and the reporters were wonderful women - but they were totally shocked and overwhelmed and started crying! - anyways this is the story they printed about me and my bubbas!! - you dont have any control about content - it was pretty shocking to me too!!?? (Oh that's right - I'm dying!!??) - dont know what to think about all this right now ~ just try and focus on the positive right now - it came from a good heart.

And I HATE the photo of me!! Doesnt look like me at all!! Any way its done now - cant change it - and I'll have to get another copy that you might be able to read!

http://her2support.org/vbulletin/pic...1&pictureid=47

So things have been up & down. Then I got a temp of C38.4 just after I finished me 1st 2 weeks of Xeloda - but seem to becoming good now after I started on A/B's.

I have been TOTALLY EXHAUSTED - more than I could ever have imagined! Where do you folks get your energy from???? I guess sometimes things can be abit more difficult because we are caring for our beautiful bubs - but dad does most of that work - because I can do so little :-(( - which really upsets me by the way.


So after my little complain! I remember to be grateful, commit to my own grieving process - which includes cries and laughs, my own sobriety, prayer & meditation, spending time with my gorgeous family and friends and coming here when I can - I do try and drop by and read even if I dont have the energy to post.

Much love and blessings to each and every one of you. You are a blessing in my life.
hermiracles.


Joan M 11-08-2008 01:08 PM

Marilyn,

I'm sorry that you had to endure the press under these circumstances.

Despite their dire predictions, it seems like you were very busy with the National Breast Cancer Awareness Day. And how do you keep up with the bubbas? No wonder you're tired. They're adorable!

I'm praying that the Xeloda and Tykerb work magic for you.

Joan

BonnieR 11-08-2008 01:22 PM

Marilyn, your attitude is amazing and inspiring. I am sure you contributed greatly to the awarness day.
You mentioned your sobriety, prayers and meditation. I have found great comfort in the principles of recovery too.
God bless. And keep the faith (I know you do)
Love, Bonnie

Mary Anne in TX 11-08-2008 01:44 PM

You are simply amazing, Marilyn! AMAZING!!!
And I think you're rightfully tired! those little adorable bubs are so lucky to have you for a mom!
I'm still prayin' for ya and believing for a super miracle!
So good to know you!
You bless us all. ma

StephN 11-08-2008 02:11 PM

GOOD ON YA!

But it is always kind of a shock to what the press will write. The editors could have used a little less flagrant headline, for Goodness sake!

I hate to see us used as a way to sell papers. The headline makes it sound like you are on your deathbed, which WE know you are NOT!

Would love to have a link to the article so we could read it. Just a link should do it. Then we can all send "letters to the editor" and set them straight!

Just get all the rest you need, and don't fight it so hard. We know you want to do what you can for your children, and you do. Just being there to let them crawl all over you and feel your love is good enough for them.

Thanks for the update.

Carolyns 11-08-2008 02:43 PM

Oh my, all I see is a beautiful Mom and babies.

I guess a caption could be put next to anyone stating that they are dying. Right? I am a mets gal myself and it really aggravates me when others act as though we are the only ones with a terminal illness. Life is terminal and it always ends in death.

I wish you love, hope and peace. You are so brave to put yourself out there.

Carolyn

tricia keegan 11-08-2008 03:22 PM

Marilyn,I'm sorry you had to see a headline like that just to sell newspapers but I also see a lovely woman with her two babies. You look great, and your happiness in your children shines though. Keep fighting !!

vickie h 11-08-2008 09:54 PM

The Press
 
Marilyn, Your babies are beautiful, as you are also. Maybe the press will help spread some awareness (any awareness) of what we go through. I am sending you my prayers and some energy and lots of love, Vickie

hermiracles 11-08-2008 10:08 PM

Hello folks ~ thanks so much for your friendship and support. It makes a difference thats for sure.

We went to a great meeting this morning ~ Spiritual Concept ~ always love those meetings and then we went for lunch afterwards ~ which was nice with the bubbas. BUT everything is such a struggle - getting in and out of car etc etc etc - and most of this falls on Anthony - my hubby - I try and help out and we have lot of services lined up to help us - but it does put a strain on our relationship..... oh well, we do the best we can ODAAT..... one moment at a time.

Then I rounded things off with vommitting +++ out the car window. I need to take a breakthrough now and have a nap. A is trying to get our gorgeous ones to settle.

Thanks so much for being here friends - it makes the journey not so lonely.

I can't stop thinkin about sweet Lily.

Blessings all
Hermiracles (Marilyn)


Oh and the link to the actual article... never thought of that Steph.... good idea..thanks:
http://www.northernstar.com.au/story...-start-school/
the steroid-affected round face is very attractive eh? not!! LOL!!! ;-)

Bill 11-08-2008 10:25 PM

sweet Marilyn, as always, for what it's worth in this crazy scheme of things that we have to deal with, you and your bubbas and your family are in my thoughts and prayers. I guess the media there is much like the media over here. They rope in a larger audience when they snare your heart-strings. You are an amazing woman, and you keep fighting the good fight! Love and Peace to you and yours, Bill

Paty 11-08-2008 11:07 PM

Dear Marilyn,

I always read your posts and I have come to admire you sooo much. I admire your strenght and energy to fight this terrible disease, as well as the strenght of all our sisters here. I will go to bed tonight with a special prayer for you dear. I send you all my love to you, even if we are sooooo far away.

Paty

flynny 11-09-2008 05:18 PM

Marilyn, Although I haven't been on this board for long. You are truly an inspiration to us all. You are a beautiful woman/mother. Contineu to keep your spirits up and when your too tired, we will guide you through those days. Your babies are gorgeous and they know their mother is a fighter! I will continue to pray for you.

Jean 11-09-2008 10:46 PM

Marilyn,
I have been thinking of you and was happy to see you posting.

My goodness, could you not have gotten into the NY TIMES!....I am sorry but that paper has the look of what we call here in the states a Rag Newspaper, which is not
a high rating...I feel they took advantage of you. But
we sure would appreciate a link to that paper as Steph
suggested so we can all have a wack at them!

As always your babies look beautiful and so do you,
all mothers are beautiful. You keep up the strong fight that you do...I am strongly praying for you and all in your family..

Much love,
jean

StephN 11-09-2008 11:45 PM

Jean -
Check at the bottom of Marilyn's post for the link - it's under her name.

Just goes to the article, which is actually a bit tamer than the headline - thankfully.

sarah 11-10-2008 08:36 AM

Marilyn you're inspiring. I'm counting on the doctors getting it wrong and a miracle. Your babies are beautiful.
hugs and love
sarah

TSund 11-10-2008 09:10 AM

Marilyn,

Just a note to let you know we are thinking of you. You are a profoundly inspirational woman.

Thanks for being you.

Love and Peace,

Terri

Believe51 11-11-2008 10:03 AM

Marilyn
 
I prefer to say you are fighting for your life, not dying but that is just me. I love the article and so wish I could actually read it in full. You are an amazing person who is truely inspiring to all you come in contact with.

I LOVE the picture of you three. Right up there with 'priceless'.

Sending love and prayers to the whole lot of you>>Believe51

PS: Just read the article and loved it. What a pleasure it is to know such an inspiration!!!


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