So long for now................................
 

I will be taking a bit of a reprieve from her2support. The site has become wayyyyyyy more than I can tolerate and before I say things that I will regret I have decided to take a break from here. I know I will check in to read about my "sisters" (can't help it....as I love you) but I can no longer be an active member of site that isn't so much about support anymore but about self healing through positive attitude. ABSOLUTE HOGWASH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

For all my sisters out their who believe they are somewhat at fault for the "situation" they are in as far as illness or progression of their illness goes TAKE HEART. It has nothing at all to do with you. ABSOLUTELY NOTHING!

You all know where I stand. I know I don't have to go into any explanations. Life is good...........life can be unfair................our attitudes help us along our journey...................but ultimately God is in control and when it's our time to return to Him we will return to Him.

I'll never forget my dear mom, who died of pancreas cancer at age 47. She suffered incredibly........................she fought the fight..............prayed her heart out................................stayed focused and positive......................................BUT she is now at Home with her Lord. You see!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! She was healed. Our ultimate Healing. We will all be healed. Eventually. Whether earthly or Heavenly. It will come.

So all this hogwash on "it's all about you" - don't beat yourselves up those of you who are bothered by this thinking. You're all fighting couragesly and I salute you. Keep up the fight - stay strong - find the blessings in your journey.

Love to all............................................and Peace!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Mary Jo

Marejo, I learned long ago that all forums have some type of disputes and I've really been both flabbergasted to see BC survivors fighting amongst themselves, and pulling together because we all fighting a common enemy.
I've been real impressed with this group because of the lack of in-fighting and the amount of support.
I've quit posting in a some groups because they were squabbling and while trying not to die, I have changed my way of thinking and decided I don't want to be around negative stuff, if I can help it.
I don't agree with every idea that's here, or elsewhere, but I also think that if something works for one person, then I'm fine with that.
I haven't posted in that thread, and I'm not taking sides at all. I only know that you are needed on this forum and I hope you don't leave for long.

sorry
 

I am sorry marejo, that I am going to use your thread to further comment on how I feel about Andi's treatment. I have no choice - I said I wouldn't post again on the other thread, and I'm a girl of my word :)

I don't see it the way you do. I have a HUGE problem with the way Andi was viciously attacked for stating HER beliefs. I don't agree with everything Andi says, but I respect her right to say it. I also respect the rights of those opposed to her views.

Andi was attacked, hurtfully. No one was ever asked to apologize for their views and beliefs. With or without scientific studies to back her up, Andi's Truth is her Truth. Andi's attackers went for her jugular - downright meanness and hostility. There were more attacks on Andi's character than on her message. Although some came to her defense (not of her beliefs, but to the way she was being viciously attacked), most remained silent. This is a Board full of intelligent, polite discourse, a lot of humour and some confrontation. Andi's attackers went too far and not enough of us stood up for ourselves and for what we want this Board to be for us.

BAD THINGS HAPPEN WHEN GOOD PEOPLE DO NOTHING.

HE WHO ALLOWS OPPRESSION SHARES THE CRIME

IF YOU'RE NOT PART OF THE SOLUTION, YOU ARE PART OF THE PROBLEM.

I am NOT referring to Andi's views and beliefs. I am referring to the horrible way she was treated.

This AM, Believe posted her thanks for this unbreakable, unconditional bond of friendship. Marejo has posted about the HOGWASH of self healing through positive attitude and is taking a vacation from the Board. What's happening to us????? Chrisy.......have you figured out a way to wiggle through the www and put us in "time-out". This is crazy.......

My Dear Please Do Not Go For Long...
 

Mary Jo,

I will miss your postive posts. I can completely relate to your feelings and views. I hope that the someday soon the true intent of this board will find its way back.

From the Home page:

Philosophy
Through a team effort this unique support group seeks to promote education by maximizing the utilization of available resources. We promise to assist members by supporting their concerns and providing links to news and current research. ---Christinie H Druther MSPH, founder

Thank you for all you have contributed. I wish you well.

Fondly,

PinkGirl
 

I am reminded of:

This is MY way, what is YOUR way, THE way does not exist! I wish I could remember the philosopher who espoused this and give him credit. Of course I've rephrased it.

the quote
 

Hi Vi

You have your way. I have my way. As for the right way, the correct way, and the only way, it does not exist.

Friedrich Nietzsche

Thanks Pinkgirl...
 

That's the one!

Sad Day
 

Hey guys. It is a sad, sad, day when we lose a member with the amount of genuine love and caring that Mary Jo has in her heart. She reached out to my sister and I over a year ago with such strong, loving words. Words that carried my sister and I through those first nightmare months. My sister still can’t bring herself to read this board (because of the intense sadness she feels when reading about those that have progression). But she can and does routinely email Mary Jo who has been her rock through this whole thing. This is a support board, not a board to promote our philosophical viewpoints. It is a board that “promotes education by maximizing the utilization of available resources”. The philosophical viewpoint that “how you think determines how you will feel and how you will fare” can easily be dismissed as nonsense without a second thought sitting in my position (someone without cancer) but for someone that has been diagnosed…….. Geez, if they don’t advocate that position, it would be overwhelmingly upsetting. As if they were somehow the cause of what was happening…. if they thought hard enough they could somehow change things. I don’t think I could sit quietly on that one either. I wish I hadn’t sat quietly if sitting quietly means losing the Mary Jo’s on this board. We can’t afford a loss like this. We have already lost such inspirations as ((((hugs))))) Sandy, Love and Light Lisa and the Living Legend Lyn to this ugly disease. Let’s not lose our dearest Mary Jo because some feel the need to push their personal philosophies on the rest of us. Maybe a separate board for philosophical discussions??????

I've been away most of the day, don't know what happened but I hate to see any negativity among us. I love you all dearly.
Hugs

Mary Jo,

I hope that you will find the time off a time of renewal and be back soon.

I haven't been reading all the posts lately as I've been under the weather with pneumonia. I have no idea what has transpired but must say that I hate to lose any member from the board. Everyone is entitled to their own thinking and we must respect that. Whatever one does to help get them through the treatments, anxiety, etc of having this dreadful disease is ok with me.

Marejo
Your post saddened me....I lost one Mary Jo this year, don't know that I can bare the loss of another....we all have different beliefs, thats what makes us so individual. I feel the need to voice my opinions sometimes, but they are that, opinions, the way I feel...I hope I never offend others with the way I feel, if I do, it is certainly not my intent...I believe in the power of posiitive thinking, and in the power of prayer...I do not think I would have survived the last 5 1/2 years without both. Did it alter my disease???, probably not, I'm back on chemo again, but it has made this whole ordeal easier to deal with, so I continue to what works for me. Now my prayers will shift, and be that you will miss us, and come back to the board...you are such an inspiration with positive thoughts and prayers...don't know what I'll do without!
Like I said, I lost one Mary Jo this year (my best friend), I don't want to lose another.

It's a loss for all when someone publically leaves or "takes a break." For balance, reading all sides makes this website valuable for me. Then I can figure out what fits best for me.

This is probably way too simplistic--sometimes I think varying opinions are in the "both/and" rather than "either/or." That's what I took away from the posting. We are different in many ways but come together sharing a Her2neu diagnosis. I liked the quote "your way, my way, and right/correct/only way does not exist."

So sorry
 

We who have suffered sooo much--surely it is we who should be the most humble?? No one can speak for anyone else, they can ONLY talk about their own experiences. sorry it has come to this, marejo, hope to see you back

Hope you don't stay gone long. I'll miss your advice, especially on family matters. My 18 yr. old's baby is due May 3, and I'll need lots of help since I'm still not thrilled with it's impending arrival.

Oh Mary Jo,

I am so sad by this. You were the very first one to respond to my first post here. I will never forget your kindness. You and I share a lot of the same beliefs and I hope that you are not gone for long. We need you. I need you.

God Bless,
Faith (Tonya)

I didn't ever click on the post in question, so I can't speak to it directly, but I have to say that if you feel you need a break, by all means that is understandable. We all can feel that we need to take a deep breath, re-assess, and re-energize from something that zaps us.

"...of a site that isn't so much about support anymore but about self healing through positive attitude." Personally and respectfully, I have to agree to disagree with you there. I don't feel that one thread can possibly set the tone of the whole board. My experience of this board does not correlate with your sweeping assessment. Respectfully, I believe that one apparently contentious thread does not speak for the overall essence of the board.

Marejo, I am always touched by your love, optimism and kindness. I love what works for you in this journey, as I also love my spiritual connection to God. He is my partner in this, as is my doctor and the healthfulness of my inner dialogue. I feel I am truly blessed by God in this life. I also choose to take a pro-active approach in the proper care and feeding of my neuropeptides these days.

Please keep well and keep up with us. We hope to see you back soon!

MaryJo, You have always been so positive and have carried me across the dark, rushing waters when I was frightened. I will always hold you in my heart and hope you know we love you. I hope you stay and become part of the change , we need you and care about you. My sister and friend, I will be here waiting for you when you come back. Love and hugs, Vickie

I haven't a clue as to what is going on, but Mary Jo has the best pictures!!! How can you leave??

Ah well, you must do what you must do Mary Jo and if being here is a distress to you then you should leave to seek comfort and peace in your life.