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-   -   Words of wisdom needed waiting for results (https://her2support.org/vbulletin/showthread.php?t=34645)

G. Ann 07-07-2008 08:44 PM

Words of wisdom needed waiting for results
 
Please share your wisdom, strategy, tricks on waiting for biopsy results.

I had stereotactic biopsy done on remaining breast on July 2. With the holiday, results seem slow getting back to me. Some obvious methods, such as prayer, are in the forefront, but I'd love to hear how you spend your days (and nights) waiting for test results. You'd think after four years I'd be a master; it seems like I go back to square one in a flash.

Becky 07-08-2008 03:35 AM

I believe there is no easier way. In October I had a cyst and couldn't think of anything else until "cyst" was formally announced. I had even seen a Reiki specialist who told me to "not put my energy" where I didn't want or need it to be. Of course, regardless, she was right but it is way too difficult to do.

The only thing that does seem to help a bit is long walks by yourself. Exercise in general helps destress and if you take the walk where other people won't necessarily see the tears flow, then you can really kill two birds with one stone. Take a hanky or tissues. For me this helped because I didn't want my one child still at home (16) to needlessly worry until my results were conclusive (she figured something was wrong anyway).

I just don't see an easier way besides that (and having a couple of glasses of wine too). It is natural to go off the deep end. When you hit the ground, somehow, no matter what, you land on your feet and just keep going.

My thoughts and prayers are with you as I really understand what you are going through. Considering I still have both breasts, I wonder many times what to do with them (had digital mammo yesterday (routine) and all was fine but none-the-less). I will have all my fingers and toes crossed for you. Call your onc or surgeon to have them rush the results along. Call today so you don't have to wait any longer than necessary.

Hugs to you

Mary Jo 07-08-2008 05:07 AM

HI G.Ann

I, too, hear you. I hear you loud and clear. Especially the part about "going back to square one" while we wait for test results. I can't imagine that any of us couldn't, knowing all we know. At the beginning we think "nahh, it could never happen me" but when it does, well, reality bites you in the - you know what!http://her2support.org/vbulletin/images/icons/icon7.gif So, when biopsy or scan time comes we now know that anything is possible. Then comes the hard part....waiting....stressing....thinking every bad thought imaginable.....OH it's hell!

On a more positive note now.......for me personally there is nothing better - more comforting or more real....than in staying in close contact with my God through prayer. I know that may sound cliche' to many but God is real...His love for us in real and although bad things happen to good people, God doesn't cause them to happen. So, while I wait and while I stress and while I think of everything bad thing that might happen to me I pray and ask God to give me His comfort and peace. Then I focus on all the eternal promises He promises to me by believing in His son Jesus. I know in my heart of hearts that no matter what happens to me His love and promise of eternal peace and joy are waiting for me because I believe that Jesus is my Savior and died for me. It's the ONLY thing that brings me any sort of comfort and peace while I stress.

Debbie made a good point (in her post to Sherry about good books).....we are all dying. Yes, that is true. From the day we were all born we've begun to die. We are all a journey and so many things will happen to each of us on that journey and many of them not good BUT how we deal with those "things" makes all the difference. I believe the verse in the bible that says "for we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love Him and were called according to His purpose.."Romans 8:28 If we focus on what's negative and run with it then it all seems negative but if we trust and believe that God will work all things in our life for good you'll be amazed at the blessings you will find along the way. I don't just speak flippantly but I speak from a heart that knows it to be true because God doesn't lie.

So, G.Ann, those our my words of wisdom.......it's what "works" for me. Does that mean I don't stress or worry over "cancer" - sadly, not at all.....for goodness sake we are human beings.....but it helps me keep it all in perspective....knowing I have a Savior who knows my tomorrow's already....that helps me. Psalm 139:16 says ....."all the days ordained for me were written in your book before one came to pass....." That verse has always helped me "rest" while on this journey. I know that God knows each day where I'll be ... and I'm right where I am suppose to be.....Does that mean God doesn't grieve when His loved ones suffer?...ABSOLUTELY not! It means that we live in a fallen world, where freewill is ours. While we journey this road we will have many sad but also happy, joyous days and our God will be with us each step along the way until the Day He calls us Home to Himself to live in peace, joy and love eternally.

Sorry to sound preachy but you asked for my "words of wisdom" and here is my heart on my sleeve. I pray it brings you some sort of comfort and peace as you wait and I'm sorry you are in this "waiting pattern" - it's awful, I know.

Love to you dear sister......

Mary Jo
"For God so loved the world that He gave His One and only Son that whoever believes in Him will not perish but have eternal life." John 3:16

trailrider 07-08-2008 05:40 AM

G Ann
 
I found and find comfort in listening to relaxation CDs..check them out at any large bookstore. Also reading scripture and highlighting special verses.

I am going to pray specifically for you that the results come in today. I wish you would call the office staff right away and see what they can tell you.

Keep us posted. Praying.

MJo 07-08-2008 05:46 AM

I try to calm myself down naturally -- I get accupuncture, take walks, walk around my garden. But when all else fails, I take Xanax.

basset girl 07-08-2008 08:48 AM

G. Ann, I am praying for you to have peace during this time. Sometimes it really helps me to try to do something fun with my daughter or friends. Even if it is just to watch a movie together or bake together. Anything to keep my mind occupied. Mary Jo, thank you so much for your post. You do not know how much it helped me to read it today!!! You are such an inspiration. Thank you.

G. Ann 07-08-2008 02:11 PM

Hi All,
What a great group of "sisters" to share your ways of coping with the waiting period. I did hear from radiologist this afternoon and it's kind of the "gray" area news--findings were atypical. Maybe it's on the way to become cancer or maybe it never will develop. The recommendation is for an excisional biopsy in case something was missed. Since I was strongly considering a prophylactic mastectomy as this is my third biopsy & scare in four years, I don't know if that's necessary. The radiologist was calling the surgeon and I'm sure I'll hear by the end of the week what his suggestion would be.

All of the posts were so reassuring. I didn't feel preached to, but very peace-filled in reading all of your wisdom. We can all use and turn to prayer, toes/fingers crossed, good thoughts being sent, along with leaning on family/friends, having fun, listening to good music, exercise to get the frustration out, and a glass of wine now and then. Meds are good too when needed.

Thanks again for your pearls of wisdom. I'm so impressed and grateful for this website.

PinkGirl 07-08-2008 02:31 PM

Hi G.Ann
If you have a 1/2 ton truck and a garage door, you can do what
I did while waiting for MRI results, but it is kind of expensive!

Everyone has given you good advice. I try to keep busy, spend
time with close friends, do things that I really enjoy doing and when
I get truly overwhelmed, I get out the Ativan. Good luck with all
of this waiting and decision making.

Bill 07-08-2008 06:35 PM

Hi G. Ann! Waiting for test results is one of the worst things to deal with. It's the same old "fear of the unknown" thing. We always discussed what we would do with the results of the test(s) and then plan a course of action. If the test showed "A", then we had a plan to deal with "A", if the results were"B", then we had a plan to deal with "B". Once you evaluate or analyze your options after getting your results, and have a plan to deal with those results, it can be comforting. Sometimes, the news can be devastating, but at least you have a plan, and YOU are still in charge of your life. I'm a chess-player, and have played over 2500 games in my life, and a long time ago, I realized that often you know that the game might not be going your way, but you need to clear your mind of all distractions and make the best move that you can at that time. Life is like that, too. Evaluate your options and do the best thing, make the best move you can, at that time, and that's all you can do. And like Curly said on City Slickers, "find the one thing....that makes you happy"

G. Ann 07-09-2008 01:05 PM

Hi Pinkgirl, --Would love to hear the entire story about the 1/2 ton truck and the garage door. Thanks Bill for your input--having a plan or plans is usually my coping pattern.

Now I'm waiting for a phone call regarding the excisional biopsy or just going ahead with the mastectomy. Thanks to all of you and some good sleep, the waiting seems manageable.


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